


Losin' Control

by Bolontiku



Category: MCU, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Brainwashing, Eventual Smut, F/M, Mutant Reader, NSFW, Physical Abuse, Reader Insert, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-15
Updated: 2018-12-15
Packaged: 2019-09-19 17:59:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 22
Words: 28,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17006454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bolontiku/pseuds/Bolontiku
Summary: Working at Stark tower has let you meet some great people. Bucky is just your friend…right?





	1. Chapter 1

“Y/N!” 

You turn to spot Pepper hurrying towards you and slow down to a stop. “Ms. Potts,” you offer her a smile, “What can I do for you?”

She stops and catches her breath, “now you know it’s Pepper, look, can you make sure these papers get sent out? I have to catch a flight out to DC immediately, I will owe you one.”

You roll your eyes, “You don’t owe me anything and it’s not a problem.”

“Oh, shit.” she stomps her foot, “Can you go upstairs and get Tony to sign off on these designs? I am really sorry!” she makes a face and you laugh.

“I understand, plus you can take me to lunch when you get back. Now go!” you watch as she hurries off with a barely mumbled thank you, her strawberry red hair bobbing up and down in its pony tail. You don’t envy her job, you could only take so much of her boyfriend Tony, not in a bad way but he often went off in little rants and you could never understand what he was talking about.

Your job was simple, you oversaw the ordering and inventory of the kitchen. You had been in catering when Ms. Potts swooped in and offered you the job, she had been more confident in your skills than you. She had been right, a year into the job and you knew exactly what needed to be ordered and when. What could you say? You loved food, and you loved the business, and it came as second nature to you. 

As you waited in the elevator you checked your phone, a few messages from a friend that you could ignore along with random notifications which you cleared. You looked up as the doors opened, not the floor you wanted, but you smiled at the two men before you “Hey guys!” you smiled brightly as they stepped in crowding the elevator. You tried to make yourself smaller even though the elevator was spacious.

Sam smiled at you, his gap showing, you thought it was cute, “Hey there Y/N, hows the kitchen business going?” he asked warmly.

“Busy as always, nothing I cannot handle though. What are you two up to?” You glance over at the one who was so silent. 

Bucky caught your eye and smiled, his smile was like a beacon of hope. You stopped the sigh that tried to pry itself from your lips and shoved it back down your throat. “well, doll we are goin' to annoy the ever loving shit out of Stark.” he answered with a conspiratorial smirk.

You couldn't help the giggle, “What a coincidence! I’m headed up to see him too, can I go first as I need to get him to sign these papers for Pepper and if you guys go first I might not be able to get this done.”

Sam chuckled as he watched the two of you. Bucky had completely shifted his entire body to face you and had even taken a few steps into your personal space and you…you were just so clueless about it. 

You looked up as Bucky stepped closer the smirk still on his lips, “If we do does that mean you’ll whip something special up for us doll?”

Your body wanted to react, but you were so great at covering up your gut reactions and schooled your features, “Well I’m not in the kitchen..”

Sam cut in, “How about dinner then?”

You laughed and looked over at him, “Whatcha got in mind Wilson?”

Sam practically jumped in excitement. “Jambalaya!”

You giggled and looked back at Bucky as the doors opened, he smiled at you, his hand on your back as you stepped before him, “Yeah? I guess I can make that by tonight.”

“Make it spicy!” Sam exclaimed, seemingly more excited by the second.

“What are you making spicy and what time do I show up?” Tony asked looking up at the three of you.

Sam let you move forwards before answering as you handed the papers over to Tony. “She’s making Jambalaya!”

Tony had gotten used to seeing you every now and then since Pepper asked you to help her out occasionally, plus you two were steady friends. “Ahh, so what time should we be at your apartment?” he asked.

You snickered, “How does seven sound?”

The three men cheered and you shook your head slipping away. The doors were shutting when you heard a muffled sound and looked up to see a metal hand sticking through the doors. “God!! James!” you exclaimed as he pushed the doors open against their will. “You always surprise me with that…did you forget something?” you asked looking up at him.

“Bucky, call me Bucky,” he told you and smiled as the door shut behind him. You smiled nodding as you leaned against the wall closing your eyes and letting your head fall against the wall. He took the opportunity to look at you freely, eyes greedily roaming over your figure.

You were grateful you could dress in whatever you wanted and not in some suit, you had worn your favorite skinny jeans and a top, a small vest over it, your fave and most comfy heels finished off the look. It was a cute outfit and more than comfortable, not that you’d be turning heads. You were comfortable in your skin, but it had taken you years to love your own figure, and had come to the conclusion that you would never be ‘small and perfect’. It also gave you the ability to be so at ease with everyone, never having to worry about if someone would crush on you. To you, no one would ever be interested in you. So there was no awkwardness to complicate any friendships.

“I was, uh, just wondering…” you perked an eyebrow opening one of your closed eyes to peek at him as he spoke now staring at the floor. Goodness, he really was handsome, never mind the whole super-soldier thing. James Buchanan Barnes was a heart breaker in his own right. He was so cute you couldn't keep your eyes off him and was often the first thing you thought of when you had a chance to just think.”What..if anything I could bring over?”

You chewed on your bottom lip for a moment thinking, “maybe a wine? I don’t think I have anything that you guys would drink. I mean I can do soft drinks, but I am sure Tony like his own kinda drink, he brought his own when he and Clint came over last week.”

“Oh,” Bucky ran his hand through his hair.

You looked over at the disappointed sound, “You alright?” 

Bucky chuckled, “I didn’t know they had gone over….they know where you live?”

You laughed as he followed you into the offices. “Well, yeah…” You stop for a moment excusing yourself as you hand over the papers and tell the guy at the counter that they need to be delivered, pronto. Bucky watches as the guy flirts a little with you till he see’s Bucky standing not far away hands shoved into his pockets glaring at him. He ducks his head and you frown, “Kay dude! Thanks for all your help, stop by the kitchen, I’ll get you some of that pudding you like!”

The guy brightens up but avoids Bucky’s stare and you turn around beaming at him, “Weelllll! That's it for me today, guess I’ll head out to the grocery store and get anything that I need,” a small chuckle and you tilt your head at Bucky, “Weren’t you going to pester Tony?”

Bucky looks away from you, “Yeah well…I thought it’d be better to talk to you.”

A grin spreads across your lips. “Awww, I’m not special at all Bucky! But…if your not doing anything and don’t mind being bored by me…” you wait till he glances over at you with those blue eyes, your rocking back and forth looking thoughtful. “I mean if you got nothing to do, well you can tag along and we’ll get the stuff for tonight's dinner?“

Bucky cleared his throat. “Y-Yeah! That sounds great!” He looked down and you perked an eyebrow, “I’ll come back later for clothes, unless…wanna come up so I can snag an outfit for dinner later?”

You chuckle, “Sure! I’ve never really been around the rooms though, sure I’m allowed there?”

Bucky shook his head smiling conspiratorially at you once again, making you catch your breath, “We’ll just sneak you in doll.”

You followed Bucky out of the elevator, he had wrapped his hand around yours and you hurried to keep up with his long quick strides. There really was no one around and it took less than five minutes for him to snag his pack and stuff a change of clothes into it. Before you knew it you were back downstairs and he insisted that you take one of Tony’s cars. No one argued with him when he told them to bring a car around. As you rode in the car next to him you were grateful, you couldn't imagine taking the subway with him. Too many people cramped the subways now, people always jostled you. Many apologizing when bumping into you, hands touching…you shook your head as you reached the grocery store and Bucky opened the door for you.

You made your way down the aisle, looking over your list you had scribbled chattering away with Bucky. He smiled and seemed more at ease with you than he had before. You looked over and frowned when you saw he wasn’t paying attention.

Bucky grunted as a loaf of bread hit the side of his head and you broke out into a fit of laughter. “Doll….”

You held your hand against your chest, face hurting from laughing so hard, “Whats up? If you are too bored you can take the car back to the Tower, I won’t be offended really!”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “It’s not that at all.”

Your perked an eyebrow, “Then what is it James?”

Again he rolled his eyes, “Bucky, not James, I just noticed when people stare,” he shrugged and dropped his head.

You looked around and noticed a couple women staring, their eyes roaming over his frame. You looked back at him, he didn’t realize what they were staring at. You moved closer to him, tugging on his jacket till he bent over to hear your whisper. “They’re checking you out James.”

He jerked back eyes wide as you cracked up again. Lightly smacking his arm, he looked around. He hadn’t realized you had been talking about the  _women,_ he had been talking about the men staring at you. Now he definitely felt the eyes of the women on him and he hurried to catch up to you.

You had reached the cashier and were still busy laughing at him for being so oblivious. Bucky smiled, he liked being around you, you made it easy.


	2. Chapter 2

You answered the door and flung your arms around Clint who lifted you up and stalked into the kitchen. “There’s my girl!” he laughed giving you a forceful kiss on the cheek. He paused holding you against him, “Damn that smells good!”

You beamed up at him, “where are the others?”

“What others?” he asked playfully, eyes twinkling, “I told them you cancelled so that I could have all the food to myself.”

“Yeah good thing we didn’t believe his lying ass!” Sam interrupted followed by Tony and Nat.

You squealed and hugged the redhead who wrapped herself around you, “If you keep cooking like this then I am going to marry you.” She warned as she set down a bottle of wine, Tony setting another by hers.

“Is Steve not coming? I mean we made enough…” You looked towards the door.

Nat tilted her head, a smirk on her lips, “Steve is going over to pick up Bucky, what do you mean we?”

You bit your lip, “James helped, he’s taking a shower right now though. Can someone call Steve and let him know?”

Sam frowned, “He spent the rest of the day with you?” did you really not get it? He wondered throwing a knowing look at Clint.

You nodded moving into your small kitchen, “guys…”you looked at the feeble four chairs you had around the table. “I know! I’ll go ask the neighbor if she’ll loan me a couple chairs! OH! I have that yarn she wanted too, shoot…I gotta get it from the room. I’ll be right back!” You hurried into your room and opened the closet, looking around till you found the box you needed. You reached on your toes and managed to catch the edge of the box, pulling it towards you. It jettisoned itself towards you and you closed your eyes, this wasn’t the first time this had happened.

You blinked, no sharp corner on your face? Looking up still fearful that maybe it was teetering on the corner and just waiting till you looked up exposing your eye and stab you the moment…you saw shiny metal till you realized it was a  _shiny metal arm_. You followed the arm, craning your neck back till the top of your head bumped into his naked chest and you could see his face.

Bucky perked his eyebrow at you. “Need this doll?” he asked handing it to you.

You turned smiling up at him. “Thank you!” you giggled, “everyone is here, I just have to run over to the neighbors and borrow a couple more chairs…I think its gonna be a little bit cramped though,” you frowned and Bucky couldn’t help but pinch your nose making you scrunch your face at him.

“Don’t worry so much, everyone is happy to be around you.” He grumbled turning around and pulling on a black tank. You squirmed in place and he turned around when you didn’t respond, “Alright?”

You nodded with a nervous smile. “C-Can I?”

Bucky tilted his head and smiled when he realized what you were asking, he took a step closer to you and held his arm out. You set the box down quickly and watched his face for any sign of discomfort. Your hand gliding into his, moving up his forearm and to his biceps, he shivered as your fingers slid up to his shoulder, where metal met flesh. He jerked back as your fingers ghosted along his neck.

You dropped your hands quickly and smiled at him, “You’re just beautiful!” you turned and left with the box leaving him standing there with his mouth agape. Bucky ran a hand through his still damp hair,  _‘I like her as a friend, no one that pure could ever have feelings for me,’_  he told himself. He snagged his henly and jerked it on, lips pursing.

He had enjoyed cooking with you today, you were at ease with him, never once acting nervous around him. You had even tugged on his hair once or twice, though you had had to stand on your toes to properly reach. You had corrected him when he was cutting something wrong, placing your hands over his to help him slice. It had taken everything in him to keep his hands from trembling.

He was used to the team, they had taken him in and forgiven him his past. Things could get touchy with Tony, but for the most part everything had been good. You were the first person to not treat him differently, he had tried talking to several people around the tower and that had ended pretty quickly. They all knew ’The Winter Soldier’. He wondered if you knew of his past? He stepped out the room and was welcomed by everyone.

Sam punched his shoulder, “You cannot hog her to yourself, if I had known you were going to do that I would have come!”

Bucky shrugged his shoulders and moved around the table, everyone was already serving themselves when Steve poked his head in and smiled, “Yeah I made it!” he held his hands up. “Thanks Nat for letting me know this knuckle head was already here…”

Bucky gave him an apologetic look as he reached for a bowl handing it to the blonde before grabbing one for him and you, quickly filling them up. You came back in smiling. “Well the neighbor was able to loan me one chair, so I’ll just stand.” You raised your eyebrows in surprise as everyone complained, and Nat stood quickly abandoning her chair and sitting in Clint’s lap, easily comfortable. “Nat, you don’t have to-you’re my guest!”

She scoffed, “He doesn’t mind at all, and if he does tough shit,” she punctuated with a wave of her hand.

Clint just laughed reaching around her to grab his food. “God, Y/N! I think I’ll fight Nat in order to marry you, this is so good! You made it spicy too!” he threw you a wink making you blush.

You sat between Bucky and Steve blushing, a plate was placed in front of you as well as a drink. You laughed and leaned forwards as Bucky reached around you to hit Steve for something he had said.

“I will have you know I am a good cook!” Bucky defended himself. His breath caught as your hand fell on his thigh your head tossed back as you laughed. He caught Steve staring, face smug and Bucky had to tear his gaze from you.

“Bucky is a great cook! He helped out so much today….ohh, excuse me.” You stood and rushed to your phone that you had left on the counter. “I’ll be right back,” you hurried into your room, closing the door for some privacy.

Steve nudged Bucky, Sam throwing a knowing look at him as well. “You should ask her out.”

Nat cheered, “Yes!”

Bucky rolled his eyes, a clear sign for them to drop it.

___

You looked over your shoulder as you answered the call. “This is Y/N, how can I help you Mr. Fury?”

“Gonna need you tonight, have need of your talents. I need to know what is inside this fuckers head and pronto.”

You nodded as you closed your eyes, “yes sir, I can be there before midnight, I have guests at the moment.”

“Yeah kinda hurt I wasn’t invited. Whatever, I can’t ask Wanda to do this, you need to be here before midnight,” with that he hung up and you sighed. 

You had to concentrate while touching a person, but you could read minds this way. No one knew, as far as anyone at Avengers Tower knew your sole purpose there was to run the kitchen.

You took a deep breath and stepped out.

Everyone was laughing and you smiled wide, Bucky slammed his hand down on the table, making you jump slightly. “Dammit, I said I do not like Y/N! Now stop with it already!” he growled angrily.

You froze, your hand had just touched his muscular shoulder and you felt him freeze under your hand. “Well, that’s good to know there Soldier, thought I was going to have to beat you off with a stick ya know?” You laughed as you pulled your chair out and then thought better of it.

Nat stood off of Clint as you backed away. “I uh, just remembered…yup.” you didnt finish but backed away whirling around to escape your suddenly too small apartment.

“Y/N!” Nat and Clint hurried up after you as you slipped out the front door.

“Fuck,” Sam sat back, “Guess it’s time to clean up?” Tony sighed face sober as they all realized that their teasing of Bucky had caused more trouble than anticipated.

Bucky pushed his chair back, his hair falling around his face as he grabbed his bag and started for the door.

“Buck!” Steve called after him following him out, he stopped him before he could reach the stairs. “It’s not your fault! We were all egging you on,” he sighed as Bucky refused to look at him. “Bucky, you gotta stay, we’ll explain,” he pleaded holding onto his shoulder.

Bucky shrugged Steve’s hand off and pushed the door open. Steve looked over to the elevators where you stood beside one, Clint and Nat in front of you. He squared his shoulders and walked over. “Hey Y/N?”

Nat glanced over at him, he was surprised to see you completely fine, not a single tear. “Yes Steve?” you asked him voice chipper, he almost missed the slight waver of your voice, almost and it hurt. They had caused you pain.

He sighed, “Look you oughta know, Bucky didn’t mean what he said. We were kinda picking on him as I was sure he had a crush on you, well I was certain that he liked you. I know he likes you, otherwise he wouldn’t have spent the day with you.”

You shook your head, pursing your lips. “Okay? Look I just have to go down to the complex office, they uh called and I gotta go check something out.” You felt relief flood you as the elevator finally opened and you stepped in. “Look just, lock up, you don’t have to clean, it’s fine. I’ve got my key with me. Plus, I gotta swing by the office…” you blabbed till the doors shut you away from them.

Nat frowned, “did she say she needed to go by the office? So we’ll see her there tonight? Maybe we can get Bucky to go down to her office and maybe talk things out?”

Clint frowned, “this kinda went sideways. Both of them are pretty cute together-if they could just see it,” he crossed his arms over his chest, “probably think neither is good for the other.” He let out an irritated huff of air, the other two nodding somberly.

Steve frowned, they had fucked up royally.


	3. Chapter 3

Fury frowned at you. “He’s been restrained, won’t be able to hurt you at all.” You stared at the young man in the chair, he barely looked past twenty, what was he going to do to hurt you? “Don't be fooled Y/N, he may look innocent enough but that one there is responsible for over thirty kills in which he was directly involved with at least half of.”

“What are we doing with him then?” You asked, your eyes flitting over to the tall dark man beside you.

Fury pursed his lips. You never asked, “something happen tonight?” He redirected.

 _‘Dammit, I said I do not like Y/N! Now stop with it already!’_  His voice rang in your head and you shook yourself, closing off. Fury took note. “No, it’s fine. Start recording once I touch him.”

Fury raised an eyebrow at your cold tone. Something  _had_  happened. He would look into it later. “Like always,” he nodded and watched as you stepped in.

The dark haired young man looked up at you. “Who are you?” He asked quietly looking around the room his eyes settling on the two way mirror.

You pulled the seat opposite him out and slid into it, “My name is of no importance, what is in your head is. I will be extracting information you have not divulged as well as verifying what you have. Make sure you are not feeding us false information.” You leaned forwards and met his gaze. “Are you paying attention Mathew?” You asked coolly, folding your hands in front of you on the table.

He pulled back, “you can’t do more than that man has already done.”

You took in his current state, nodding as you noted the cleaned cuts, swollen lip, and blackening eye. Fury had just started with him and decided it easier if he used you.

“Well Mathew, that's why they called me in. I will take it directly from,” you paused and pointed at your own temple, “here. No need to talk or go through any pain.” you sat back in your chair relaxing.

“Your going to rape my mind?” He asked incredulously. It was your turn to flinch now. “I’ve heard of your type,” he bit his lip and you saw him pale before raising his chin defiantly. “So start,“ he said with false confidence.

You looked over your shoulder at the mirror. No sign of interruption so you stood walking around to stand behind him. You saw him tilt his head back and his dark brown eyes met yours. You hesitated as you saw something in them.

Fury frowned, there had been something there, for a second. Then your fingers had connected with Mathew’s temples and within minutes you were talking. He watched the screen beside him, the red light indicating it was recording.

You weren’t sure how long you were in his head. There was never a feeling of time. Sometimes it was seconds, other times you would be gone for hours.

You were surprised as you moved to pull out of his mind, you felt a hand clamp down on you wrist and saw him in front of you. You shook your head, not really him, he was wispy and transparent, just an outline of his physical being.

 _‘Please, I know what you can do, return me to who I was before all of this.’_  He begged looking back over his life for the past years. The darker ones.  _‘You can do it. I’ve made bad choices, I just want to go back to my family.’_

 _‘I cant guarantee they will let you go back. What will you do if they throw you into a hole and toss the key? Be tormented for what you don't remember?’_  But you knew that look.

Fury threw you so hard against the glass behind you, it shuddered. You took in a deep wavering breath. “WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!” He demanded yelling.

You looked over to see Mathew slumped in the chair. “What happened?!”

Fury pulled you up by the front of your shirt. Dragging you into the other room roughly. Playing back the video you saw you had relayed the last of the information you had found on the attack Mathew was involved in, and the one he had been planning with several others. This new information would thwart their plan with a preemptive strike from Fury and the Avengers. Then you stood there. Un-moving for fifteen minutes. You had said nothing, none of the last fifteen minutes of monstrous Mathew. Not one peep of what you had been up to.

You had erased him. Deleted the monster out of the twenty-four year old. Twenty-four and he had killed so many. You knew what had sent him down that path and had taken it as well. Now all that was left was the innocent boy.

Fury growled at you, “What. Was. That?”

You squared your shoulders and met his angry gaze with your own heated glare. “Its the reason you have me on payroll. Its mind rape.”

Fury’s jaw clenched and he worked a few choice words over and finally turned away from you, shoulders slumping. “You’re done, go home. See you in the kitchen tomorrow.”

You nodded. You just needed to get out.

_‘Mind rape. Its the only thing your good for. Why do you think I stuck around?! We needed you. Your powers. Otherwise your useless. Why the FUCK would anyone want to be with you otherwise?! It was hard enough kissing you without vomiting much less having sex with you?! UGH!’_

You covered your mouth as you made it down the elevators and ran for your office, voices of your past running after you.

_____

“Buck, just go see if she’s in her office. We spoke to her. C'mon, she likes you otherwise it wouldn’t have hurt her.” Steve cajoled.

And so Bucky found himself walking towards your office. He was sure he must have missed you it was so late. He sighed as he made it to the door of your office and found it open but the lights off. He was about to leave when he heard a soft sound.

He leaned towards the door and heard it again. A sniffle. His chest constricted. It was his doing you were crying.

He pushed the door open wider and moved in. “Y/N?”

“Hey Bucky,” you tried to sound cheerful, it didn't work as your lip quivered.

He made his way behind your desk in the dark and slid down beside you after a second of hesitation. “I’m sorry doll, I didn't mean what I said. It was a misunderstanding.”

You chuckled in the dark. “I-It’s fine Bucky really it is. I am not someone…” you waved your hands in the dark and he tensed as you leaned into him. “Not a lot of people are interested in me. Its fine, I know you would never be interested in me romantically. We can just be friends okay? Don’t feel the need to pretend around me.”

Bucky cursed in the dark and you pulled away, “Y/N you are beautiful. I would be beyond myself if you considered dating me, there’s nothing wrong with you.”

You dropped your head. You knew he was trying to make you feel better. “Bucky, I don’t need you to pity me nor do i need to be a pity date. I am fine being alone and….this,” you motioned to yourself wondering faintly if he could see you in the dark, but not stopping. “My current state is not because of what you said earlier.”

Bucky reached out in the dark, his training and instincts allowing him to cup your cheek in his hand. “Then what? What could make such a fine woman like yourself cry?”

You leaned into his touch, it was nice having someone so kind not afraid of who you were. “There’s something you don't know about me Bucky, something no one on the team knows. Maybe Nat,” you sighed. “You’ll probably hate me.”

God, Bucky had had those thoughts running through his head earlier. If you only knew everything he had done you would hate him. “Nothing you’ve done could ever make me hate you.”

You whimpered in the dark and he wrapped his arm around your shoulders pulling you closer to him. “Bucky, I…I can read minds.” You waited, waited for him to pull away and cry out in disgust and hate. Waited for him to ask if you could read minds for him. Instead….

“There’s this kid that can turn his whole being into fire…his sister….she goes poof! Invisible. Her husband stretches like…whats that green things name? The cartoon play-doh thing..oh! Gumby! And there's a thing on their team too. Guys all rock…can you imagine? I mean does he have a di-” he cut himself off as you giggled.

Your giggle turned into an all out laugh and soon you were crying again, this time from how hard you were laughing. “You’re something else James.”

“Bucky, call me Bucky doll,” he whispered to you in the dark.

You turned to look at him in the dark and felt your heart stutter as you felt his breath against your lips. “Bucky…”

He closed his eyes, he knew you weren’t  _trying_  to seduce him, but god how much he wanted to just take you right here and now, especially with you whimpering his name like that. “How…are you reading my mind now?” He asked feeling a blush creep up his neck.

You giggled terrorizing him for a moment, you could tell he was embarrassed and even when you couldn’t see in the dark you knew he was blushing. Bucky was just like that sometimes. “I have to concentrate really hard. Have to touch you, skin to skin…best if I’m touching your temples.”

Bucky licked his lips,  _‘skin to skin’_  he thought, he hadn’t forgotten his proximity to you. “So why is it…” It dawned on him just then. “Fury is using you.”

You felt him pull away slightly and your heart dropped. Here it was. He wouldn't want anything to do with you now. “He has me on payroll, I figured I ought to get paid for it instead of being used for it. Got tired of being used, this way I get something out of it instead of just fuckin heartbreak.”

Bucky felt his blood boil, someone had lied to you. They had told you they loved you and used your love for them in order to use you for their benefit.

“So here I am,” you sighed. “I understand that I am raping their minds, but their bad guys. Isn't it a bit justified?” You gave a little laugh knowing that it was wrong. He would tell you that, and that he would have nothing to do with you now.

You instead felt his fingers on your chin, how could he find you so easily in the dark? And he tilted you chin back, you weren’t sure what was happening when you felt soft lips descend on yours.

You froze, then melted into the kiss. It was over before you could memorize the feel of his lips, or take in a deep breath of his scent.

“You’re no monster doll,” his voice rumbled raw and honest in the dark.

You crumbled. Sobs wracking your body as he wrapped his arms around you, mumbling soft words in another language to you. You weren’t sure what he was saying but knew they were meant for comfort and you took it.

After hating yourself all your life. After being used. After being told you were nothing but a monster. This kindness was your salvation.

And you clung to it with desperation.


	4. Chapter 4

 

You sighed as you begrudgingly followed Bucky back to the elevators and to his own floor, you figured the other had their own as well. Following him in you balked, it was as big as your tiny apartment, bigger!  
  
Coming up you had encountered zero people, which was odd since you were used to the hustle and bustle of everyday activities. No one was around, everyone long gone to bed. You really had no idea why he had come looking for you, too emotionally exhausted to think or remember anything at the moment.

“You wanna go to bed or..?” He let the question trail looking towards his bedroom.

Looking at him, seeing the concern clearly written across his face you felt the tears start again. Bucky pulled you down onto the couch and into his arms.

“Shhh, doll. Its alright, I won’t let anything bad happen to you.” He whispered. You wrapped your arms around him unable to form words. “Hey…if you go on like this I’ll have no choice but to join you.” He threatened pulling you onto his lap. He didn't know how to console you and it was making him desperate. He just wanted you to smile again.

“What does Fury have on you?” He asked quietly once you had cut back to sniffles.

You shook your head burying it under his jaw, he made you feel safe. He made you feel like you like you weren’t a monster. And the way he effortlessly lifted you onto his lap made you feel as if he  _would_  protect you.

“Hey, c'mon, you gonna tell me? There's got to be something.” He waited, taking in a shaky breath he asked a little afraid of the answer, “you know my background?” You nodded once and he took in a deep breath, “then you know, there's worse that you can do than just raping a persons mind.”

He waited patiently, one hand on your back rubbing small circles till your sniffles subsided. He was going to ask again when he felt your hand on his chest. You were fidgeting with the opening on his collar and couldn't miss his gasp.

Looking up you saw he had his eyes closed. “Bucky?” You asked softly.

He took a breath before answering, “yeah, sweetheart?”

You licked your lips staring at the hollow in his neck. “W-why did you kiss me?”

“I asked first.”

You bit down on your bottom lip, shifting in his arms. “I… I’m from Venezuela.. My government used me. I de-destroyed a lot of powerful men.” You closed your eyes once the memories came back. “I was young and in love with one of the military men there. He…used me. In order to get classified information. Most of the time the men didn't even know what I was doing.” You let out a sigh cuddling closer to him. Bucky dropped a hand onto your knee. “I uh, found out my boyfriend was cheating on me. He said….well anyway.“

“Fury found me in there. They had me locked away. Told me they would kill my family if I didn't do what they wanted.” You refused to look at him when he craned his neck to meet your gaze. “He uh, guaranteed my families safety along with giving them a home here. I just cant contact them.” You shrugged even though it hurt. It had been over five years since you’d seen them.

Bucky sighed he needed to keep his temper in check, he would go see Fury soon, “you were forced to do it. I know what that's like doll. You have to realize your not a bad person because of it. Hell, I’ve worked hard to realize that myself. You are not your past.”

You fought the tears, but they came unbidden and soon you were crying again. Clutching at him, how had he managed to become the one to anchor you when you felt that you were spiraling out of control?

Bucky rocked you back and forth and soon you were yawning. It had been too long since you could freely talk to someone. Tell them everything you had feared, how much of a monster you truly were, what you had done. And he accepted it. He didn't run away. He didn't want to use you. You were certain he would never want you.

Bucky stood without effort and started towards the room, he looked down when you protested in his arms. “Hush, you need to sleep, when you wake up you can take a shower. I have things to get done, don’t leave. Got it?” He asked tucking you in now, dropping a kiss on your forehead. It reminded you that you needed to ask him something.

“Bucky?” He looked up at you, “thank you.”

He nodded and waited till your eyes were closed and your breathing evened out.

****

Clint doodled on the pad before him bored as it was too early to be getting mission intel, Nat peeking over to see the cartoon rendering of Fury and smirked before going back to listening to him. Steve perked an eyebrow at her, they all looked up as the door swung open. “Bucky?” Steve called as his friend stalked into the conference room.

Bucky paid him no mind as he zeroed in on Fury narrowing his blue eyes, which flashed with fiery anger. Fury scoffed ready to sass him as he stalked forwards, Nat and Steve standing suddenly aware of the danger but too late as Bucky caught Nick by the neck in his metal hand and slammed him against the wall. Bucky didn't flinch as his grip tightened around the mans neck, ignoring the gun Fury pressed against his temple almost immediately.

“WHOA!” Nat cried out hurrying forwards only to stop as Bucky glared at her, a warning to all of them. “Use your words Bucky,” she urged him.

“This bastards been using Y/N!” He growled, “and he’s going to stop.”

Steve moved forwards, “Buck, he can’t breathe-” he motioned to Fury who clutched at Bucky’s hand with one hand. He hadn't pulled the trigger but stared at Bucky unflinchingly.

Bucky growled as he dropped the other man and glared down at him. “You’ll let her go,” he pointed at Fury.

“Who said she’s not where she wants to be? Look, so she gets upset a few times, its not as if her life is on the line.” Fury supplied as he stood. The other three watched not sure what was going on. “What she does provides us with intel that we would have to torture to get!” He exclaimed.

Fury flinched as Bucky’s fist went through the wall beside him. “Fuck you, this will be put to an end!” He added threatening as he took a step back, Steve pulling him back now that his initial ire had died down.

Fury nodded, “alright, but if she is no longer on payroll then she’s just a civilian and so is her family. No more protection from us, she’ll be put out and those men that had her locked away will be able to find her again, is that what you want?” He asked. Fury didn't flinch this time as Bucky surged towards him, Steve caught him about the waist and dragged him towards the door.

“C'mon….lets talk this through Buck…Nat-” he looked over his shoulder at the redhead who hesitated a second and followed, Clint close behind.

They found themselves in the common room, Bucky pacing restlessly as he told them everything.

Hope I got everyone! Let me know if i didn’t!~Tiku


	5. Chapter 5

The morning had been hectic, following Bucky’s assault on Fury they had listened to what Bucky knew and Natasha decided she would handle everything, but she needed to know what  _you_  wanted to do. You had been dealing with this for some time now, rather well. It was imperative that you make the decisions about your future.

Bucky agreed having calmed down after talking with them he realized he couldn’t just go and make decisions for you. Especially after what Fury had said about you no longer having S.H.I.E.L.D.S protection. How would you feel about that? He wondered if he could find a safe place for your family, for you. The thought hurt, would you leave? Just when he had begun to get closer to you?

He paused outside the door to his rooms. He would figure it out later. Right now he wanted to see you. He pushed the door open and walked in, the small living-room was quiet and he went to check on you. Still fast asleep, he shut the door to his bedroom and sighed. He needed to get you some clothes, texting Nat he got a quick reply. She would get you some clothes for when you woke.

Steve came in, not even knocking, he had a case of beers in hand and Bucky sighed in gratitude. “Figured you could use a few beers. And these are Thor’s favorite.” He handed one over to Bucky as he sat down on the couch. “So, you and Y/N?!” he asked smirking.

“Shut up jerk, its not like that,” Bucky punched Steve’s shoulder as he walked over dropping down on the couch next to him. “It’s not like that,” he rubbed the back of his neck. God he wanted it to be like that.

Now was not the time though. He heard Steve sigh as his friend sat next to him, “What is it then? She obviously trusts you more than any of us, she told you, nobody else knew not even Nat!“

Bucky ran his hands over his face roughly, shoving both hands through his hair frustrated. He wasn’t sure how to proceed. He looked over at Steve who was watching him with concern.

“Y/N is different. I know,” he paused unsure of what he wanted to say. “This time, it took a heavy toll out of her Steve.” He knew how she felt, “she thinks she’s a monster an-and I know how she feels but I don't know if I can help her. I  _want_  to help her.” He ended frustrated.

Steve balked at that. His brows snapping together in concern, “Bucky, its gonna take time. Remember what you went through? You’ll just have to be patient bud,” he clapped Bucky on the shoulder.

Bucky nodded sighing, “she goes in without their consent and relays the information she finds for Fury. Sometimes she takes it too far and wipes their memory, sometimes she does it at their request.” Bucky frowned looking at the space in front of him, before continuing quietly. “She was afraid I would hate her.”

Steve gripped his shoulder, “I hope you proved you didn't? Look, do you care about her?” He asked. Bucky nodded, not having to think about it. Steve chuckled, in front of others he would try to protect you as he thought of himself as a bad choice which made Steve scoff. But here? Alone with his best friend he could be as open and honest as he wanted. “Look, we’ll do what we can. Nat is already looking into it. Do you know what she wants?“

Bucky shrugged his shoulders. “Said she should get paid for what she’s good at. That no one has wanted her for just her. Her last relationship was a facade, he was using her, and when she realized it they threw her in a jail cell forcing her to do what they wanted or they would hurt her family.” He nearly growled, if he could get his hands on that motherfucker…

Steve chewed on a thought. “We need to find out what she wants to do. It seems like a helpful trait to have, but she shouldn't do what she doesn't want to.” He took a sip of his beer and looked over at his life long friend. “You, uh, talk to her about what happened at dinner?”

Bucky’s head dropped forwards, shoulders hunching, “She doesn’t think anyone would ever be interested.”

Steve scoffed, “that's! What? No! She’s beautiful.”

“I know that!” Bucky gratefully exclaimed. “Yeah…when she smiles, she’s got this dimple..only on the right side though.” he hummed the corner of his mouth curving up as he thought of your smile.

Steve smiled shaking his head. “Man, you got it BAD.”

Bucky let his head fall back onto the couch, “I know!” He exclaimed.

Steve chuckled.

______

The shower was great, you stood under the hot water longer than you should have and let your head clear.

As you reached for the shampoo and conditioner you smiled.  _‘I’ll smell like him’_ , you thought giddily.

There was a knock on the door and you weren’t sure what to do. Bucky’s muffled voice came through the door, “uh, Y/N? Nat sent some clothes for you to change into. I’ll set them on the bed. J-just come out whenever your ready!”

You sighed, “thank you Bucky!”

Bucky smiled on his side of the door. He liked you saying his name, he set the clothes down and heard the water turn off. He hurried to the bedroom door and stopped. If he…he shook his head. He was a decent guy, scratch that, he was going to be good and not do what he was thinking of doing and hurried out the door.

You poked your head out the bathroom and checked. Coast was clear. You had your hair up in a towel, another wrapped around your torso. You had been slightly surprised it completely covered you then realized Bucky’s shoulders were twice yours so…then you couldn't stop thinking about his bare shoulders…bare chest..that rockin’ body.

FOCUS! You would have to thank Nat later.

It wasn't long before you stepped out of his bedroom barefoot. Still Bucky seemed to have heard you and looked up, “hey there doll,” he greeted you with a wink and that heart stopping smile.

You felt your cheeks burn slightly as his eyes slowly drifted down your form and his tongue darted out sliding over his sinful lips.

You needed to remember that he was your friend. The only friend you had that knew the whole truth about you.

“We match.”

You blinked, completely lost in your thoughts. “Huh?”

Bucky smirked, “we match,” he pointed at your outfit and his own. “Not that I was trying…Nat sent the clothes after I dressed this morning…” He snapped his mouth shut, you didn't know what he had done this morning after you fell asleep. He would have to tell you about it, you would more than likely be angry at him, he let out an audible sigh. “I got ice cream.”

That got your attention. “Ice cream?”

Bucky nodded, “wanna pick out a movie? Nat and Clint say the best way to cure the blues is to ‘stuff your face and watch shitty movies’,” he quoted fingers in the air as he stood making his way over to the freezer and pulling out several pints. “Wasn't sure which you would want-”

You automatically reached for the banana crumb flavored one and he chuckled, he frowned when you reached up on you toes and tugged on his collar till he leaned down. Your lips ghosted over his cheek and his heart about burst through his chest. “Thank you Bucky, this is exactly what I needed.”

Bucky swallowed, your eyes were still puffy, but your nose was no longer red. “Yeah, of course Y/N,” he managed.

“I get to pick?” You asked staring up at him, head tilted.

Bucky let out a soft, “hmf?” Too distracted by how soft your lips looked. He looked away as you licked your lips, pulling the bottom one between your teeth as you shifted from one foot to another.

“Movie?” You asked uncertain. He was acting weird. Your shoulders slumped a little as he pulled away from you and your chest ached. He was trying too hard. He was pushing himself to act normal around you. “I-its okay Bucky…” He looked over at you as you pushed the ice cream container into his hands. “I know…people don’t wanna be around me when I tell them what I can do.” You hiccuped as you took a small step back eyes tearing despite your effort to control your emotions. You had wanted so badly for him to be okay with this, you hadn't even realized how badly you had wanted it, “it’s probably better if I go home probably. I’m really sorry I just kinda dumped everything on you.”

Bucky tossed the ice cream onto the counter by the small freezer, he hurried after you and caught you as you moved to head back into his room and collect your shoes. “Y/N! Its not that!” He exclaimed wrapping his arms around your waist. Your hands landing on his forearms as he buried his face in your hair, Jesus was that his shampoo? Why did it smell different in your hair? “You’re just so damned cute,“ he finally uttered.

You froze. “W-what?” You choked out, unable to stop the tears. “Its not funny to joke like that James, that's hurtful.” You couldn't help crying, the tears just came unbidden.

“Heeeyyy,” he whispered softly into your ear, “I’m not joking Y/N,” Bucky chuckled shaking his head and squeezing you tighter in his arms. “Your so fucking cute I can’t stop staring at you.” He dropped his head onto your shoulder, he could see your face turning red and wasn’t sure if you were upset or embarrassed. “I know what I said last night, but its because…” he let out a sigh and you squirmed as his face burrowed into your neck, “I am the monster, I ain’t good enough for you.”

You whirled around despite his crushing hold on you and caught his face in your hands, “James Buchanan Barnes!” You exclaimed making him wince and chuckle at the same time, “you are no monster! You are the funniest, hottest, sweetest, most caring person I have ever had the privilege of meeting! So I don’t ever wanna hear you say that again!”

Bucky pulled you into him, you leaned back as he dipped his head closer to you, “yes, ma'am,” your breath left you as you remembered the quick kiss you had shared with him last night and your eyes fell to his lips. “Hottest?” He asked voice low and teasing.

“Is that all you got out of tha-” he cut you off, his lips crashing down on yours hot and heavy. Your hands fluttered against his chest till he guided one around his neck, the other following suit, your knees weakened and he held you up against his hard body.

Needing air Bucky broke the kiss and dropped his forehead to yours. He smiled and looked at you. He loved how your eyes were slightly unfocused, lips parted red and swollen from his attention.

You furrowed your brow and he kissed you again quickly. “Doll, I know what your thinking.” You looked up at him, clearly confused. “I ain’t here to use ya….” He bit down on his lip for a moment, “go on, look with your powers. See for yourself how I feel.”

Your lip quivered, “Bucky,” slowly reaching up Bucky leaned down a bit more so that you could reach his temples.

You were surprised at how much he had been watching you. How his eyes would linger on you, how he was jealous of the mail boy the other day. How he glared at every guy in the grocery store, never once seeing the women staring at him. How he tingled when his hand touched the small of your back.

How horrible he felt when you walked out at the wrong time and heard him utter those words.

Bucky caught your chin in his hand tilting your head back, bringing you back to the present, his mouth closing over yours as you came out of his mind. Your fingers grazed over the skin of his neck, sliding into his dark silky hair as he pulled you into him again. You gasped and he tentatively pushed his tongue into your mouth. Your knees gave out and he pulled back still holding you against him.

“It’s fine!” You found your footing, “I’m fine!” You laughed, “Jesus…you gotta warn a girl before kissing her like that!”

He smiled down at you wickedly, “cause I’m the hottest?”

“Oh for fucks sake! Your never gonna let that go are you?!” You giggled smacking him.

Bucky chuckled, “what are you looking for?” He asked as he watched you look around.

“My ice cream!” You exclaimed and frowned at him, “nope, you don't give a girl ice cream and promise movies with her and then just kiss her senseless…”

“Senseless?” He mused letting you go to retrieve the small pint of ice cream from the counter. “What are we watching then?” He asked following you to the living-room where you sat down. He sat against the arm rest and quickly wrapped his legs around your waist dragging you closer.

He smirked at you, “we just made out, I kissed you ‘senseless’ no reason for you to be sitting over there. You’re my girl now.”

“Just like that?” You asked raising an eyebrow.

Bucky’s confidence wavered for a second as you reached for your ice cream and he pulled it away quickly holding it above his head. “If your not my girl you don’t get ice cream.”

Your mouth dropped as he smirked at you and you narrowed your eyes at him. You let out a dramatic sigh, “I guess, if I have to suffer…will this mean more kisses?”

“And cuddles….maybe, if your persuading enough I may let you take my….hoodie.”

You gasped, “oh! You are serious!” You giggled and leaned over him your lips so close to his he faltered, his eyes zeroing in on your lips. You snatched the ice cream from his hands and he groaned as you pulled away to grab the remote. 

“Doll, you forget I’m the hottest? You’re supposed to wanna ‘jump my bones’ now that I’ve claimed you my girl and kissed you twice. Once of which was to the point of senseless.”

You giggled as he wrapped himself around you, “hush the movies beginning.” You squirmed till you were comfortable, back pressed to his chest, his legs on either side of your waist, arms wrapped around you, chin on your shoulder.

Bucky groaned, “what kinda movie is ‘Zom-beavers’?”

You giggled, “the best kind!”

He looked at you, later. He would talk to you later about speaking with the others, right now you needed some down time. He smiled as you snuggled closer to him and he hoped you wouldn't be too angry with him.


	6. Chapter 6

 

You had dozed off at sometime during the movie. Bucky smiled as you shifted atop him, getting more comfortable in your sleep. He caressed your cheek, brushing a strand away.

You made a noise in the back of your throat and Bucky craned his neck to look at you. He stifled a groan as you moved your hips back against his. “Y/N…” He whispered nudging you lightly. Again you murmured in your sleep, Bucky’s hands flew to your waist when your ass ground into him, how many times had he stared at said ass when you walked out of a room? How many times had he wanted to feel your ass against him just like now?

Bucky bit down on his bottom lip as you moved again, this was torture, it was too soon to be attempting to do anything sexually. He threw his head back staring at the ceiling balefully, grinding his teeth willing himself to not to move. “Y/N!” He bit out, “Y/N…babe if you-” a hiss escaped him as you moved again, his hips snapping up to grind into your ass, his hands pulling you into him he couldn’t stop himself from getting hard with you grinding down onto him.

“Fuck…fuck…fuck,” he took in a steadying breath. He could deal with this. A low groan escaped him as you moved in your sleep, your hand clutching at his jean clad thigh, so close… “No…Y/N, wake up…c'mon. You can sleep on the bed, Y/N!” His breath hitched as he couldn't stop pressing up into your soft curves. “Fuckfuckfuckfuck..Y/N, I swear I am trying to be a good guy here and your not making it any easier…” his voice was low, practically a growl as he gently shook you.

“Bucky?” Your voice was sleepy and he nearly groaned from relief as you looked up at him.

“God your so fucking sexy!” He bit out pulling you up to meet his lips. You made a noise and he pulled you closer, making you straddle his hips. His hands running up your soft legs till he reached your waist where he gripped you so tightly you whimpered into the kiss. You gasped as his hands slid up under your top, sliding over your heated skin. You moaned as his tongue slowly sought the sweet heat of your mouth, tangling with your own.

His thumb grazed the bottom curve of your breasts and you jerked, your hips slamming down on his and you groaned as you felt him pressed hard up against your clothed core.

You had awoken cause you had heard him grumbling, or had he been groaning? And there had been a tight grip on your hips. When you looked up at him his blue eyes had been completely blown, and you had called his name. Then his lips had come down on yours.

Now you were here, grinding your hips down onto his, large strong hands slid further up cupping your breasts, softly massaging. You couldn't help but arch into his strong large hands.

Bucky lifted his hips, your hands digging into his hair. You yelped when he caught your bottom lip with his teeth and you pulled back. “Fuck doll…” he groaned, his metallic hand slid up and around, sending chills throughout you as he traced your spine. You moaned as he pulled you back down, his flesh hand still pawing at your breast, to kiss you.

Hot and demanding, his lips moved over yours and you lost yourself in the fire that was moving throughout your body engulfing your being.

A knock at the door made you start. It came again. “Ignore it,” Bucky growled kissing you again.

“Bucky? Y/N! We need to talk!” Came Nat’s voice through the door.

Bucky groaned as he dropped back onto the couch. He pulled your hips down onto his as he shoved up, your eyes widening at how hard he was under you. He smirked up at you as he rolled his hips against yours. “She’ll go away,” he whispered as his fingers unbuttoned your shorts, making you whimper as they slid in.

“Bucky I am not going away!” She shouted.

“Dammit Nat!” Bucky yelled pushing you onto your back and pinning you down, your legs automatically wrapping around his waist, a gasp escaping you as he ground his hips into yours. Damn he was big and god what he was doing felt so good you couldn’t stop your own hips from moving up to meet his causing him to drop his head to the crook of your neck, his lips moving over your skin. You giggled as a knock sounded again, your hands on his shoulders. “Fuck, Nat! Give us half an hour!” his hands were moving along your legs and you whimpered beneath him, causing him to groan.

Another knock resounded on the door and you could hear Nat talking to someone. “Buck?”

You broke out in peals of laughter as Bucky groaned dropping his head to the arm of the couch above you. “This isn't gonna happen….“ he bemoaned stilling above you.

You giggled as Steve’s voice came through again. “Just answer them, I have to….bathroom?” You tilted your head towards the room standing.

Bucky caught you up in his arms making you squeal. “Don’t think this is all I want you for doll,” he nipped your neck quickly, hot breath fanning over the shell of your ear. “You were just squirming in your sleep….taking advantage of me and all.” He finished sounding scandalized.

“Bucky! Go answer the door before they break it down thinking we’re dead!” You shook your head a smile on your lips, “pssshhh, me take advantage of you-” you muttered. You heard him laugh as you closed the door behind you.

When you were finished cleaning up you stepped out to find Nat and Steve were still there. “Hey guys!” You greeted.

Nat hugged you as did Steve. “your looking..refreshed. You okay?” Nat asked as Bucky and Steve continued talking.

“Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” You asked your smile unwavering.

Nat quirked a brow at you, “Tony and Clint are waiting to talk with us. Lets go,” she hooked an arm around yours and you saw her level a glare at Bucky who shied his gaze away from hers.

 _‘Really Barnes?’_  her mental voice was so strong you almost pulled away,  _‘better hope she forgives you for this idiot!’_  Even if you hadn’t been able to read minds you could see the conversation between them physically.

You finally did pull away with that last bit and you felt panic fill you. It was exactly what he said he wouldn't do! Your chest hurt and Nat looked at you confusion written on her face. “E-excuse me!” You hurried out of his rooms ahead of them trying to control your emotions. He was using you, he hadn’t let you really scan him-that would take at least a good half hour. No, he had distracted you, with those damned lips of his. Your stomach twisted as you remembered your first, the way he sneered at you when you had found out…clenching your eyes shut you sobbed at the thought of seeing that same expression on Bucky’s face.

You were spun around suddenly, Bucky’s hands on your shoulders. “NO!” You cried tears forcing their way out as you struggled to get loose from his grip. You couldn’t do this again, couldn’t feel this way again just to find out it was all a lie.

Bucky’s face softened, he guessed what you were thinking, his hands ran down your arms and he was bringing your hands up to his temples. “You should look doll, I ain’t here to take advantage of ya. You’ll be the one in control, always.”

He didn’t let go, kept your hands in place till you conceded and he was showing you. You jerked your hands away and looked over at Nat and Steve. “You all know?!”


	7. Chapter 7

 

You stared at Clint and Tony who sat across from you. Bucky next to you, his hand slid over yours and you brushed his away.

“Doll…” He stopped as you pointedly ignored his gaze and sat back dejectedly.

You couldn’t look at him you were infuriated. He had no right to go and tell everyone what you had worked so hard to keep a secret. How could he just do that? Try to act on your behalf?! How could he??

Steve and Nat sat on either side of you. “So,” Tony raised an eyebrow, “after Robocop attacked Fury-”

“You did what?!” You exclaimed standing abruptly the chair scrapping back from your sudden movement, “Jesus Bucky!”

“Doll, just listen!” He started as you moved towards the door.

“You have no idea what you’ve done!” You yelled at him, “fuck!” Fury would retract his protection. Your family, god, they would be sitting targets! You gulped in air. You couldn’t breathe and you could feel the room start to close in around you. “Shit…my fa-family!” You felt his hands on you and pulled away angrily, hot tears streaking down your face.

He was using you. You were certain of it now. Screwing with your feelings. He had told you what he wanted you to know, taken advantage of the way you felt about him. You froze.

No.

You wouldn’t admit that you felt anything for him. You had been so very careful to keep your distance from everyone.

No one had been able to crack your strong wall of protection. When had he? When had he made it past that wall?

“I think she’s calming down,” you heard Tony above you. When had you sat down?

Clint was in front of you, a glass of water in his hands, blue eyes boring into yours full of concern. “Don’t shut us out,” he said simply handing you the water. “We are here to help you.”

You jerked back slightly, “I can’t trust anyone,” you whispered. It had happened again. You had gotten too comfortable. Too close, let them all closer than you should have. When had that happened? Dinner at your place? The way Tony and Clint easily picked on your your first day there? Had laughed when you sassed them right back? The way Sam made it okay to just sit in silence?

It hadn’t been just Bucky, you realized with a little bit of fear. They had all managed to get past your defenses.

Fingers snapped in front of your face and you shoved Clint’s hand away with a humorless smile. “Get out of my face Barton,” you bit out coldly. His face hardened as you stood eyeing them all warily. “I don’t have to answer to any of you, so your little meeting here is useless. Tsk, just leave me alone. I gotta talk with Fury now.”

You side stepped the men and came to a halt as a hand clapped across your cheek, the pain was stinging and you raised your fist in response. Nat perked her eyebrow and you let out a little laugh, pulling back. “Whatever,” you didn't make it far as she moved in front of you, “Romanoff get out of my way.”

“Your being a child,” she crossed her arms over her chest, “you think we’re here to hurt you and your trying to shut us out cause you’ve gotten too cozy with us.” Her green eyes pinned you and your false bravado wavered.

You dipped your head before looking at her. “What? You think I gave a shit?” You let a smirk slide into place. “It was all fun, but I can’t afford to do this.” You moved your hands in front of you motioning to all of them, “Not everyone can just join your little family of supers. Get outta my way.”

She scoffed, “what are you going to do if I don’t?” She asked as she glared at you, “not two days ago you let me wrap myself around you, your gonna tell me that wasn’t real? How many times have Clint and I gotten drunk at your place and you let us crash? I kill people with less of an opportunity than that. What makes you so special?”

“Nat-” Bucky’s voice right behind you, a warning.

She rolled her eyes, before her expression softened, “Y/N, we’re here to help you. Tony has moved your family to a safe place. We can get you in touch with them if you want…”

Your lip quivered, “they think I’m dead. I can’t contact them.“

She nodded, “we know. Fury gave us all the intel he had on you, not that he had much choice as Tony destroyed some of his servers hacking into them.”

You looked over your shoulder and Tony stuck his thumb up at you a wide smile gracing his features.

No.

Don’t let them in.

Turning back to Nat you sucked in a breath when you realized she had moved closer. “Y/N, I know its been hard. I know you’re scared. I know you have your reasons to not trust anyone, but you don’t have to be afraid anymore. We’re here to help you, we are not going to let anyone hurt you. Can’t promise its all going to be easy-we still screw up.” She smiled at you then as she grabbed your hands in hers.

You took a step back shaking your head, bumping into a solid wall. Bucky wrapped his arms around you and you shook your head again. If you trusted them….they could use you. They could destroy you like no one else could.

Bucky’s warmth surrounded you and you turned into him. His strong arms holding you securely in place. “No…” you whimpered feeling your defensive walls beginning to crumble. How could they do this to you? When had you started to trust them? You couldn’t lose your carefully constructed defenses.

“Doll, you ain’t got to be afraid anymore. We’ll make sure you choose what goes on from now on. You will be in complete control of your future.“ He assured you, strong hands rubbing circles on your back.

When had this all gotten out of your hands? When had you lost control of everything? They had wormed their way into your everyday life. You weren’t supposed to make friends. You weren’t supposed to care. Why had Fury left you here? He was supposed to move you around, had for the first few months before he assigned you to the kitchen here.

“Face it, your stuck with us kid.” Clint cut in. “Wait, I think this a group hug kinda moment…”

“Clint-” you managed against Bucky’s chest, your hands curling into his shirt.

“Yeah I think it is!” Steve chimed in and you grunted as arms wrapped around you and Bucky. You heard Nat groan as she was pulled in as well.

“What the hell have I gotten myself into?” You grumbled as Clint laughed.

The door clicked open and you wondered briefly who it was, “what?! Why wasn’t I invited to this hug-fest?!” Sam exclaimed.

You grunted as the circle of arms tightened. Bucky’s lips pressed against your ear quickly making you tense before his lips slid down along your jaw and he finally found your lips.

“Eeewwww!” Clint exclaimed wriggling to get away. “Stop! They’re kissing right in my face! Let me go! SAAAAMMMMM, get the hell off!”

You snickered against Bucky’s lips. He let his forehead rest on yours, “you don’t have to be afraid anymore doll.” He kissed you again Clint dropping his head on your shoulder.

“Fine make out! Whatever….” He groaned.

You laughed and the group finally let go. “There it is!” Tony said catching your chin in his hand. “Don’t let it disappear again kid!” He frowned at you. “Now we got details to discuss! Fury has no power over you, you belong with us now!” he smiled triumphantly.


	8. Chapter 8

You stared at your apartment, lost in a daze. The last thirty-six hours were starting to blend together and you felt exhausted. You had gone from feeling as if you were completely alone to suddenly being surrounded by a group of people that claimed you now.

You smiled softly and wrapped your arms around yourself. The door opened and you heard Sam arguing with Bucky.

“Look man, so what if she is your girl? I still claim her cooking! If you can’t get over that then we are gonna have problems!”

“Shut up Sam.”

You laughed, “you two at it again?” You asked turning around to look at them. This was normal now, this felt good.

Bucky stepped up to you planting his legs on either side of you, his hands sliding around your waist, lips brushing against yours. “We could…get rid of him…” he offered hopefully.

Sam hit him on the arm. “We are here to help with dinner man! Stop trying to skip to desert!”

You giggled, “I still don't understand why we didn't just do dinner at the tower, there is so much more space there!” Bucky let you turn in his arms but kept you close as you walked towards the kitchen, his body snugly pressed against the back of yours.

You smiled as he dropped his lips next to your ear to whisper, “you know I wouldn't mind desert a little early?” you knew he felt the shiver that ran through you.

You felt your breath halt and your heart rate speed up. “Bucky….wash your hands if your going to help!” you managed.

Sam laughed, “as if he’ll be any help!” He cracked rolling his eyes as he pulled out groceries from the brown bags. “Yo man, c'mon…I want food!”

“Bucky if you don’t keep your hands offa her and we do not get dinner, we will make you regret it!” Nat cut in walking into the apartment Clint close behind. She poked at your side while shoving Bucky away until she could wrap her hands around you, Clint coming up behind you wrapping his arms around the two of you.

“Y/N sandwich!” He exclaimed, “don’t tell Buck-we’re gonna steal you away!” he added in mock whisper.

“The hell you are!” He growled as he helped Sam wash veggies and placed the meat aside to prep in a little bit.

You smiled more at peace. You had spent all morning in the conference room with them, talking over details about your family and what your future role would be at the tower. You would continue with your duties in the kitchen as you had become irreplaceable and they needed you there. Tony had given you paperwork and a small tablet so that you could keep an eye on your family.

Dinner was the least you could do for them. You were in uncharted territory and this was all you felt you had control over. This was something you could do.

_____

You waved goodbye as Sam chuckled and shut the door behind him. “Finally,” came Bucky’s voice low in your ear.

You turned around as his arms wrapped around your waist and you tipped your head back. Bucky smiled down at you pulling you into his frame. “Finally?” You asked perking your eyebrow at him.

“Now c'mon!” He exclaimed looking down at you with a slight frown, “I’ve had to share you all day long with those punks…and all I want to do is make-out with my girl and watch more of her cheesy b-rated movies with her!” You squeaked as he picked you up moving you to the couch and sitting down with you in his lap. He frowned when you squirmed there. “What are you doing?” He asked watching, hands hovering at your hips waiting till you stopped squirming.

“I’m gonna mush you…” You mumbled sheepishly, fingers playing with the buttons on his shirt. You refused to look at him. You had moved so that you were straddling him and your weight was on your knees on either side of him.

Bucky laughed, not a light laugh, but a laugh that came from the gut and rumbled throughout his entire being. You hit him on the chest as he wiped tears from his eyes. Bucky grabbed onto your waist holding you in place as you tried crawling off him. “Wait, w-where do you think your going doll?!” He asked voice dangerously low.

“Your laughing at me! And I know how much I weigh an-and! Stop laughing!” You were beginning to get upset.

“Y/N!” He pulled you back into his lap, moving his hips up into yours and causing your eyes to widen. “Your being ridiculous. See what you do to me?” He asked, you met his gaze and felt a blush cross your face as you realized the color of his eyes had almost completely disappeared. “Your ‘weight’ is not a problem for me, actually…” You yelped as his hands landed on your ass making you squirm forwards and against him. “Fuck doll…” he said biting his bottom lip and closing his eyes.

You weren’t sure where to move, as if you moved back you moved further into his hands and if you moved forwards… You moved forwards. Bucky groaned as one slipped from your lips. You smirked down at him as he bucked his hips up into yours his hardening member pushing up into you. “B-Bucky…”

He pulled you down into a bruising kiss, making you squirm all the more in his lap. You whimpered when you couldn't go without breath anymore and he smiled up at you sheepishly, “sorry doll,” he murmured trailing kisses along your neck till he was sucking beneath your ear, “I can hold my breath longer due to the serum…damn you taste so good!” He growled against your skin. His hands moving from your ass up to your waist, pulling you harder against him as he rolled his hips up. “Y/N,” you felt a thrill run through you as he murmured your name, his lips seeking more of your heated flesh.

“Bucky, I uhm..oh!” You couldn't stop from moving your hips down to meet his and soon your lips locked with his again and his tongue pushed past your lips, seeking to taste more of you. One large hand reached up tangling with y/h/c.

Bucky pulled away smiling as you pouted, “wanna do right by you. Gonna take you out and treat you like you should be treated,” he smirked as you dropped your head to his chest a little whine escaping you. “You trying to take advantage of me again doll?”

“Don’t you even dare!” You groused as you turned in his lap settling between his legs, and reaching for the remote even as he was pressed hard against you.

“Well you did admit that I am the hottest-” he groaned as you wriggled in between his legs and leaned back, “you are taking advantage of me!” He exclaimed dramatically. Yet his hands sought your hips and he pulled you as close as he could.

“Bucky Barnes!” You cried as his hands slid up your sides and his fingers caressed the bottom of your breasts. A giggle escaped you as he dropped his head to your shoulder.

“I am a gentleman…I am a gentleman…” He huffed before his lips sought your skin once more. You moaned as he nipped at your ear. “If you keep making those sounds I may forget and we won’t make it through this one- Zombies vs Nazis?! Doll!” He slapped a hand to his forehead laughing.

“You like my b-rated movies!” You chided as it began.

Bucky smiled settling down behind you, he tangled his hands with yours and you couldnt stop the smile that slid across your lips. You felt happy. This was happiness. Bucky made you happy.


	9. Chapter 9

The next couple of weeks passed by quickly. You became busy with the kitchen and Bucky was busy with missions. There hardly seemed to be any time for you two to spend together.

This meant lots of texting and calling but it never seemed enough. You missed having hin around and it went without saying that you were a little down because of this.

When you walked into your office and sat for a moment you were surprised when you heard your phone ring. Looking to see who it was you swiped answer as quickly as you could. “Hello?!”

Bucky chuckled on the other end. “Hey doll, hows my girl?”

You melted, “I will have to ask her when I find her…I’m sure she’s around here somewhere…”

“Now, now…"he tsked and you frowned when you heard him talking to someone else. “I don’t have long, just wanted to hear your voice.”

“Are you sure you should be calling right now? You sound busy-Bucky?!” You felt distressed as it sounded like there was a scuffled on the other end. You listened intently for a moment and everything became quiet on the other end.

“Hah…sorry, I was just thinkin of you. You busy tonight? Should be back before the night is over, thought we could go out?”

“Bucky-are you fighting right now? Should you be in the middle of a fight and talkin to me?!” You asked sitting up straight.

“Yeah, its…*grunt* its fine doll…these wireless phones are amazing! You free tonight?” He asked and you could hear a crack though you were unsure if it was bone crackinbg or the sound of a rifle breaking.

“Bucky call me from the plane! When your safe!”

“Doll you better answer me, or I will prolong this call till you do!”

“Yes! I am free tonight!” You answered quickly.

He laughed again and you worried as you could hear him fighting, small grunt of effort filling the silence and then he was breathing heavily. “Good, don’t tell Stevie I called just now. This will give me something to look forwards to, Y/N?!”

You had dropped your head into your free hand, “Jesus Bucky! Your insane you know that?”

Bucky laughed, “it was only five of them. Y/N, doll, I miss you. I miss your face, the way you smell…the sound of your voice. I couldn’t go another second without hearing it. Please don’t be mad…”

You sighed, “I am not mad. Well I am slightly angry, just get that cute butt of yours back here in one piece okay?”

You could hear the smile in his voice, “yes ma'am…Y/N…I just….okay, I’ll see you tonight. Nothing fancy, just my girl and me okay?”

You couldn’t stop the shit eating grin that you sported. “Okay. Bucky?”

“Yeah?”

You bit your bottom lip and shook your head, “just come back safe?”

Bucky grinned, “shit gotta go babe. See you tonight!”

You sat there staring at your phone and finally a giggle burst from your lips. He missed you.

He missed you so much he called you in the middle of a damned mission. While facing enemies. In the middle of a fight. You let your head fall to your desk and fought the laugh that bubbled up.

Bucky Barnes was something else. What had you gotten yourself into?

______

You looked at yourself in the mirror and pulled your hair up into a ponytail,then dropped it, only to scrunch your face up and then pull your hair up again. You sighed, he said he would be here at eight, that was thirty minutes ago. You sighed, maybe he had gotten held up with the mission?

You nearly jumped out of your skin when your doorbell sounded. You hurried over and swung the door open. Bucky looked up at you a smile on his face a bouquet of flowers in his hand. “Hey doll.”

You flung your arms around his neck, burying your face just below his collar. He laughed as he swept you up into his arms. “Hey back,” you murmured against his warm skin. God he smelled so good! Like sunshine and mint, mixed with old spice.

Bucky chuckled as he stepped into your apartment easily walkin' with you in his arms. His strength always amazed you, “ready?”

“Where are we going?” You asked finally letting him go, albeit with hesitance.

“That…is a surprise.” He dropped a small peck to the end of your nose.

_____

Twenty minutes later you let him lead you through the tower blindfolded. You held tight to his hands as he walked in front of you.

“Bucky…what are we doing here?”

“C'mon Y/N just trust me.” He finally came to a stop and you sighed reaching up for the blindfold.

His large hands on your stopped you. “Bu-” you sighed as his lips closed over yours, blindfolded you could only concentrate on the soft feel of his lips against yours. He pulled your hands around his waist and you held on as you felt the earth shift beneath your feet.

Who knew a kiss could be so life changing? It was unhurried and familiar, yet so much more. You whimpered as his hands slid into your hair, glad you chose to leave it down.

Bucky broke the kiss his head resting against yours, breathing quick. “I’ll never get tired of kissing you,” he murmured his breath on your lips.

“So do it again,” you hummed buzzing with excitement at the thought. He growled before kissing you again, crouching slightly to meet your height and this time the kiss was deeper, more intimate. His tongue pushing past your lips to war with yours. You conceded letting him take dominance happy to lean into him while he bruised your lips with his.

You felt him pull the blindfold off and pull away leaving you feeling bereft and a slight bit cold. Blinking you first noticed how beautiful he looked in the soft lighting. When he nodded his head you turned to look around.

The floor you were on was where the botanical gardens were located. You had never been there, but had heard about it. You felt your jaw slid down as you took in the soft hanging light that were strewn above a small blanket and with what looked like a picnic basket. There aside it sat an ice bucket with you weren’t sure how old the wone was but knowing it probably came from Tony himself it was sure to be too expensive.

“Bucky-” you turned to look at him as he wrapped a hand around your waist.

“A real date doll, c'mon…” He pulled you forwards and you felt a nervous giggle come up. He winked as he pulled you down and opened the basket. “I honestly have no idea whats in here. Erm, Pepper got all this ready for me. Sorry I was so late…”

You shook your head the smile on your face threatening to crack it. “Your worth the wait Bucky.”

He blushed, dipping his head down as he rummaged through the basket. Pulling out a container of grapes, a plate of cheese, he frowned at the pile of small squares on the next plate.

You laughed, “finger sandwiches.”

“So fancy…"he coughed, “gonna have to pay Pepper back for sure.”

You giggled, before reaching out and snagging one. Talk came easy. You chided him for calling you in the middle of a mission, but relented when he gave you a puppy dog eyed look. Telling him of your boring yet hectic work days.

You shared your favorite songs, and he added them to his playlist to listen to later. When you pulled YouTube up on your phone to show him a video of a puppy attempting to climb atop a couch that was too tall for it he watched you instead of the video.

You looked up at him frowning since he hadn't laughed. You blushed when you realized he was watching you. His hand caught your chin and he was kissing you again.

Time seemed to slip away when his lips were on yours. Electricity sparking throughout your body leaving behind in its wake a tingling sensation.

You sighed when he pulled away smiling. “Ready to go?” He asked standing. “Its late, I know you’ve gotta be up early and I’ve been greedy.”

You took his hand letting him pull you up with ease, again surprised at how strong he was. You shook your head and let him pull you towards the exit. “Bucky, you amaze me.”

He grinned, warming your heart as he pulled you into the elevator. You giggled as he pinned you to the wall gently as the doors slid shut.


	10. Chapter 10

 

Bucky tugged on your hand as he led you towards the elevators. It had been almost a month now. A month that you and he were dating. You smiled with that thought in your head as he dragged you into the elevator pulling you into his arms, you giggled as the doors closed and he dropped his lips to yours.

You felt your face burn when the doors opened on the kitchen floor and your friend and Chef smiled broadly at you as you untangled yourself from Bucky. “Hey there Wyatt,” you greeted him.

Bucky waved as the doors shut and you walked alongside the Chef, “Soooooo,” he smirked, “you two are pretty serious!” He elbowed you.

You smiled, “we….are..I don’t know. We are enjoying each other.” You nodded, you didn't want to label it. You didn't want to put too much on him. He had already done so much for you and you felt as if you really didn’t have much to offer.

Wyatt sighed, “tell me you’ve fucked him?”

You turned around covering his mouth quickly. “Jesus!” You cried looking around, “do you  _have_  to be so loud?!”

You jerked your hand away when he licked your palm. Wyatt chuckled, “seriously though…Y/N? Y/N?!  _Really?!_

” He nearly jumped in his spot. “At least second base?” He covered his mouth in a gasp, “you are daring!” He sat in the seat across from you in your office laughing at your expression. “Whaaat?! Prime meat like that and you haven’t done the dirty mambo with him?! You need to fuck his brains out.” He nodded raising his eyebrows at you.

You shook your head at him, his green eyes dancing mischievously at you as he ran a hand through his shaggy brown hair. “You need a haircut.”

“Change the topic all you want Y/N, seriously though what are you doing? Heavy make out sessions? Feeling each other up? Riling homeboy up and sending him home with blue balls?” He asked toying with a few invoices on your desk. “Your not doing that?” He looked up at you as you bit your lip, “SERIOUSLY?! OH! Y/N! What are you afraid of?!”

You swallowed nervously looking away and smoothing down the front of your shirt.

Wyatt smacked himself on the forehead, “please don’t tell me its not cause you don't want him to see you naked?! The way that man looks at you!”

You felt your face begin to burn, “WYATT!” you exclaimed dropping your face into your hands.

He smacked the desk top, “no! I am gonna record him staring at your ass!” he shouted jumping to his feet and pointing at you animatedly.

“Wyatt! Go cook something!” Your scream was muffled and he stood grumbling. You looked up, “Wyatt?” He stopped at your door leaning back in. “D-does he really stare at my ass?”

Wyatt’s smile spread from one side to the other, in what you could only describe as shit-eating. “You should see it. Downright lecherous!”

You groaned and dropped your head again as he laughed leaving you to think about that.

______

Tony wrapped his arms around you as you held out the platter of fruits. “I have no idea what you see in robocop, when I am right here,” He smirked kissing you on the cheek and took the plate from you.

You smiled, “now Tony,” you shot back. You were glad that they had stopped acting weird around you after that night. You were just grateful you hadn’t managed to fuck it all up.

You saw Steve step out of the elevator and smiled as you saw Bucky right behind him. You turned to Tony, “I just wanted to make sure you got that.”

“Uh-huh, don’t use me as an excuse to see your boyfriend Y/N!” He looked up at you. “Oh, Y/N? Look, there's a mission coming up, we’re going to bring back a guest. They may not be….forthcoming. I just want to give you a heads up that Fury may come to you. Now remember, its on your terms. You decide what you want to do.”

You nodded pursing your lips. “Thank you Tony.”

The door to his office opened and you turned to greet Bucky. Steve immediately wrapped you up in a bear hug, “hey there pumpkin!” He laughed as you squirmed in his grip.

“Hey back Steve-O!” You giggled.

“I still dont get that,” he sighed.

“Excuse me! Yeah, mitts off my gal!” You laughed as a metal hand made its way around your waist and Bucky pulled you free of Steve’s arms. He pulled you flush against him, hand on your chin tilting your head back to kiss you.

“Hey now! No PDA!” Tony snapped his fingers, “we are on the clock!”

Bucky smiled pulling away, “shuddap Stark, how many times have we-”

“A-tut-tut-tut!” He cut Bucky off. “How is our new trainee doing?”

You only half listened as you felt Bucky’s fingers slid under the hem of your shirt, warm fingers brushing against the small of your back sending shivers through you.

Steve was talking now and you glanced up at Bucky's who didn’t look down at you, but there was a smirk playing at his lips. You jerked a little when those warm fingers dipped into the top of your jeans.

Tony glanced over at you, “okay there pumpkin?” He adopted Steve’s nickname for you immediately.

You nodded not trusting to use your voice as Bucky kept moving his fingers along your skin, sending heat pooling between your legs as you recalled Wyatt’s words from earlier in the day. ‘You need to fuck his brains out!’ Your breathing quickened and you couldn’t stop imagining what you could be doing with Bucky…

“Y/N?” You looked up at Steve’s concerned voice. “You alright?”

You nodded quickly and then shook your head, “uhhhmm, feeling a little dizzy-” you managed.

Bucky forced a straight face, “not feeling good doll? Maybe,” he pulled away reaching up to touch your forehead. “Might wanna call it a day, your feeling a bit warm doll.”

You sucked in your breath as you looked up at him. “Ooohhh, I-” your voice came out shaky.

Tony cleared his throat, “your not looking good at all, maybe you shouldn't even make the trip to your apartment? We have plenty of extra rooms upstairs y'know.”

Bucky smiled, and it made you shiver as he wrapped his arm around you. “I’ll take you doll,” he looked at Steve who nodded, “we done?”

Steve looked at you worried, “yes, I’ll come check on you later alright Y/N?”

You nodded, Bucky already leading you out. “Ooh!”


	11. Chapter 11

 

He tugged on your hair causing you to gasp, his tongue sliding in as your lips parted, wicked, sinful, lustful.

You couldn't think, barely even registering the elevator ride up as he kept his hand on the small of your back. Not uttering a word, nor looking at you. Not that you noticed since you were trying to keep breathing.

There was no way that this was gonna happen in the middle of the day.

When the elevator doors slid open he guided you down the hall calmly explaining these were the guest rooms. No one ever came here.

No one. Ever. Came. Here.

How you came to be in one of those rooms shoved up against the wall with his lips firmly against your own you couldn't remember. You couldn't stifle the noise you made as he jerked your leg up around his waist grinding his hard length against you.

“Damn, doll, keep making those noises,” he murmured against you neck. You clutched at his strong back, praying to whatever Gods there were up above that this wasn't just a dream you were having and that you would wake from. You weakened as he bit your neck, tongue swirling over it to soothe the pain. He pulled back as you tugged on his Henley and he jerked it off in one smooth motion.

Bucky stopped as you gaped at him, uncertainty filling him for a moment. “How the fuck are you real?!” You finally exclaimed.

He snorted taking a step back, “doll?”

“Oh! I didn’t say you could back away, I just…damn you,” you waved at him making him blush. “I know I’ve seen you and Steve train but, I was always sneaking peeks and I never really got to look!”

Bucky stepped back into you, hands cupping your face, lips seeking yours with more rigor literally stealing your breath. He moved you over to the bed following you down onto it.

You closed your eyes as his hands slid up your shirt, a moan escaping you as he pressed between your legs. “Bucky,” he pulled your shirt up and off you and you bit your lip nerves wracked as he looked down at you.

“Goddamn Y/N! If you aren’t the most beautiful woman I have ever seen!” He breathed.

Your breath stuttered as his hands moved to your jeans and he unbuttoned them, sliding them down and off your hips. His lips following them down kissing what skin became exposed. You shook.

Bucky took his time, raising an eyebrow at your striped panties, “you should always wear stripes,” he growled pulling them off and moving back over you.

You met his kiss with equal abandon, his hands on your legs, pulling them around his waist his dick pressing up against your folds. You groaned needing more contact. “B-Buuuucky!” You cried writhing against him urging him on.

Bucky chuckled his face buried between your breasts tickling, making you arch into him. “Impatient arent we?”

You huffed and fell back onto the bed, glaring up at him, “don't you want this?” You asked doubt starting to creep in.

Bucky snapped his hips, thrusting into you. “OH FUCK!” He dropped his head to your shoulder as you cried out nails biting into his skin. You both stilled, breathing dor a second. When he moved it was slower, pulling back and then pushing into you as if there was nothing else he would rather be doing. “So fucking..tight!” He growled before biting down on your earlobe.

You whimpered moving your hips up to meet his, “fuck, oh, o-ohhh, ohhh,” was all you could manage. You weren't sure if you would adjust, but soon the slight discomfort you felt gave way to feeling oh so good. “Bucky! Ohhh, Bucky!” You gasped as he quickened his pace, fingers gripping harder onto the back of your thighs. Pulling you into his thrusts.

“Y/N, Y/N, ohhh fuck Y/N!” He was moving in earnest now, each thrust pushing you up slightly on the bed. Bucky watched as you dropped your head back on the pillow eyes fluttering shut in pleasure, lips parted gasping as he pushed into you, hair tumbling haphazardly underneath you, sweat glistening across you.

He cursed as he felt your walls clench down on him suddenly, you came up off the bed, arms wrapping about him, nails scratching down his back as you screamed in pleasure. You screaming his name as you came undone. God, he couldn't stop himself even if he had wanted to, he thrust into you once more before he came, hot ropes of cum filling you.

Bucky held himself above you on shaking arms, lips seeking yours lazily. He moved in and out of you slowly. You giggled as he trailed kisses down your neck, letting your hands trace slow patterns across his back. Small gasps escaping you as felt him harden within you.

“Fuck Bucky…again?”

“Mmmhmm,” he answered capturing a nipple in his mouth. You arched into him pleasure overriding your brain, your hips meeting his. You sighed as his tongue flicked over your nipple before swirling around it before he bit down. You yelped jerking at his hair. He laughed as he kissed you, you moaned as he thrust in harder and faster. “That's right baby doll, i want you to come for me.” He urged you, you cried out as his thumb slid over your clit and you jerked up into him. It didn't take you long before your second orgasm hit.

Bucky growled losing himself in you until he came, you moaned as he dropped his full weight down onto you. You laughed pushing at his shoulder. “Dammit your heavy!”

“You calling me fat doll?” He mumbled into your shoulder, eyes already closed.

“Maybe,” you answered.

Bucky rolled off you and huffed, “I am hurt! Just hurt!” He chuckled and pulled you into his side.

“Bucky…don't you gotta go back to work?”

He grumbled burrowing his face into you hair. “Whats work?”

Sleep was pulling at you and you let out a quick sigh of content. “Fuck work.” You agreed.“

"Language doll,” he murmured before you both fell into sleep.


	12. Chapter 12

 

You didn’t want to go back to work the next day. Especially not after waking up in Bucky’s arms. Definitely not after the way he woke when you shifted in his arms to stare at him pressing kisses to your face blindly and  _definitely_

not after the slow morning sex that followed.

You had an extra bounce in your step and didn't notice the grin that was plastered across your face as you made your way through the kitchen.

A certain shaggy brown haired Chef watched you with mischievous green eyes, quickly abandoning his table and what he was doing to quickly catch up behind you. You jumped when your office door shut behind you. “You fucked him!” he exclaimed loudly.

“JESUS CHRIST WYATT!” You held a hand to your chest, “you gotta stop doing that!”

“Stop redirecting and spill! I want details. I wanna know how it feels to have him atop you, how his skin feels, how big is he?!” he demanded in rapid succession.

Wyatt ducked, just dodging the file of papers you threw at him. “Shut up! I am not telling you any of that!” you cried moving around your desk.

“You gotta spill something! Inquiring minds want to know!” He exclaimed as you shoved him out of your office closing the door behind him. You leaned against the door letting out a quick breath, a guilty smile spreading across your face, before the banging knock made you jump out of your skin. “Wyatt if you don’t…” The words died on your lips as you looked up at Fury.

“I am not Wyatt.” He raised an eyebrow at you as he motioned to your office. You nodded stepping aside as Maria entered close behind him. “We have a little problem we were hoping you could fix. Nothing new, but we do have to ask for you to come down,“ he sighed annoyed that he had to ask.

Maria stepped in. “Nothing your not comfortable with of course.” she added smiling at you.

_______

You looked around the familiar settings of the interrogation room. It had been quiet awhile you realized since you had stepped into this room.

Staring through the two-way glass you stared at the man that sat there head bowed. What had he done? Where had he come from? Tony had mentioned that Fury would come to you, but you hadn’t expected it to be so soon.

Maria stepped up next to you, placing a hand on your shoulder gently, “you good?” She asked looking at you.

You smiled nodding, something felt off though. “I’m good, nothing new right? Get as much info as possible and what I feel is needed.” She nodded and you took in a deep breath. You nodded once again and walked into the room.

The man looked up and you winced, they had done quiet a number on him. Even cleaned up he was a battered and bruised mess. He grinned at you, well what you thought was a grin. “You can do what you want, I am not gonna talk.”

“Well…Issac,” you started looking at the file before you. “That is exactly why I am here, what you don’t offer willingly I am here to retrieve.” He glared at you opting not to say a word. “What is about to happen is I am going to enter your mind, pull the pertinent information out of you and you won’t even remember that I was here.”

He glowered at you, “ _Mutant_  eh?” He sneered.

The way he said it made you feel dirty, you wanted to take a step back, instead you stepped forwards, around him. He jerked the moment your hands touched his temples, curses guttural growled at you as he struggled against his restraints, you ignored them nodding at the mirror knowing they would start the recording in a second.

The moment you entered his mind you knew you were right. Something was wrong, you took care maneuvering his mind. Carefully probing, you startled when you heard a growl.

_______

“GET HER OUT OF THERE!” Maria shouted, knowing the men next door couldn’t do a damned thing she wasn't already trying, but desperation was a bitch. She couldn’t begin to understand the danger you were in. Something was wrong and they needed to get you out. The second you had closed your eyes she had felt wrong. The recording had begun but you hadn’t uttered a sound. She had called Fury informing him nothing had happened in the past ten minutes when you let out a scream that chilled her to the bone.

Terror ripped through her at that scream, she jerked forwards flying at the door in a knee jerk reaction but it wasn’t budging.

She didn’t look over as the door behind her opened, not taking one second to acknowledge Fury or the other three men that entered. Her friend needed her, she pulled her glock out and aimed at the doorknob emptying her clip.

______

Bucky had gone down to the kitchen to find you for lunch. Once he had arrived he had been faced with the grinning idiot you called you friend, who told him you had left with Fury and Agent Hill.

He had run across Steve and Tony on his way up in the elevator, both men stepping in. Tony frowned after hearing you had gone with Fury, “yeah he was supposed to talk to her about it, but we haven’t even gone to get that guy…this is someone else entirely.” He frowned, “I don’t like this.” He said voicing what the other two felt.

It didn’t take them long to find their way to the interrogation rooms. They had been talking to Fury when your muffled scream made it past the doors between you and them.

Bucky shoved Maria out of the way, he tore the doorknob off and gripping the hole left their with his metal hand he ripped the door off.

His heart stuttered as he saw you laying on the floor, the man slumped forwards just hovering above the table before him. “Y/N….”


	13. Chapter 13

 

Steve stood in the doorway, he stared at Bucky who sat at the edge of the chair by the hospital bed. His blue eyes more noticeable ringed in red. His flesh hand holding yours, thumb grazing over your knuckles.

Bucky spoke softly to you, the doctors had said that you could probably hear him. It would be good to encourage you to wake up.

Bruce and Tony were still running their own tests, three little patches on your forehead monitoring your brainwaves.

“Y/N? Please? I swear I will do what ever you want when you wake up- I’ll go with you to the amusement park. I was going to anyways…”

Steve swallowed the lump in his throat as he remembered how broken Bucky sounded when he finally made it to your side.

______

_Bucky fell to his knees beside your body, the man above you stirring slightly. He didn't care, “Y/N? Baby…baby,” he gathered your limp body up in his arms patting your cheek gently. “Y/N? C'mon doll..don’t do this to me!?” His voice cracked when you didn't stir. He pulled you closer to him cradling you, “Y/N?!” He was more desperate, you always woke so easily. “Wake up baby…Y/N?!”_

_Fury stepped in, “give her time, she’ll wake up in a few hours.”_

_Steve rounded on him, Tony stopping him just barely, “whoa there slugger!” He gave Steve a pointed look._

_“Its your fault!” Steve growled angrily. “You were supposed to talk to us about this! You agreed to come to us, and that we would be informed and present when she had to do these kind of things!” Steve yelled pushing against Tony._

_Fury looked over and frowned, not having anything to say he walked out pulling his cell phone out as he did so._

_Maria stepped in, “Bucky, lets get her down to medical-see what they say?”_

_Bucky just sat there on his knees rocking you back and forth, this wasn't right. You were supposed to be smiling, that guy Wyatt by your side joking with you, and then you two would go to lunch. You’d been talking Wyatt up to him and he actually liked the idiot, “Y/N…”_

______

Steve rubbed his eyes, he looked over as he heard footsteps nearing the room. He backed out slowly and turned with a grim face. If he so much as uttered a word he would break his face.

Tony held his hands up, Fury behind him. “I watched the tapes. There was nothing out of the ordinary. Y/N went along with it.”

“Then why the hell hasn’t she woken up?!” They all turned to find Bucky standing in the doorway. His murderous glare zeroing in on Fury, “this is your fault!” He stepped forwards and Steve stopped him.

“I have called in someone who can maybe help. He’ll be flying in via helicopter in an hour, bringing a few colleagues with him maybe to assess the situation. Look this was supposed to be in and out, not sure what happened exactly.” Fury supplied staying back.

Steve tightened his grip as Bucky tried stepping towards the man again. “Buck, lets see what this guy can do to help. Y/N needs you to be strong, she wouldn’t have done it if she wasn't sure.”

Bucky backed away, a small noise in the back of his throat and he turned quickly stalking back into your room. Steve swallowed as he turned back to Fury, “you better pray this man your bringing in can seriously help.”

Fury nodded, “I would never have hurt her. This has never happened before.”

Steve nodded realizing that was Fury’s way of apology. Done with Fury, Steve took up his spot in the doorway, keeping watch so that Bucky and you were not bothered by anyone.

_____

Tony came back down, a few hours later. “He’s here!” He smiled as Steve straightened, Tony looked over his shoulder. Hill was walking alongside the tall man, she was telling him everything that happened, explaining nothing had seemed out of ordinary, when the two came to a stop before Steve and Tony.

“Cap,” Hill nodded, “this is Dr. Stephen Vincent Strange. Doctor this is Captain America, Steve Rogers,” she introduced.

“Ahhh, how nice to finally meet you. Tony talks a lot about you!” He smiled shaking Steve’s hand firmly.

 


	14. Chapter 14

You couldn’t see much. It was dark everywhere. Trying to remember what happened seemed futile, all you could recall was hearing a growl and then opening your eyes here.

Wherever here was.

Swallowing the bile that rose as you felt fear tear through you, you crouched behind what seemed to be a wall. You were confused and tired, it felt like you had been here for ages.

There it was, the growl. You felt a shiver run through you and slowly backed up. You needed to get away, you turned and came face to face with what you could only describe as a wolf.

Black as night, though its fur seemed to shift constantly and it was as if it consisted of nothing but smoke. It stood almost as tall as you. You felt a scream rise in your throat as you locked eyes, the reverberating snarl in response made you bolt.

It was useless. It was upon you in seconds, ripping tearing, mauling your flesh. You cried out, your last thoughts of Bucky’s smile.

______

You couldn’t see much. It was dark everywhere. Trying to remember what happened seemed futile, all you could recall was hearing a growl and then opening your eyes here.

Wherever here was.

You shook your head. This wasn’t right. You stood looking around, where were you?!

______

Bucky didn't understand half of what the man was saying. “So she’s not in her head?”

“Not as far as I can tell, where is that man she was interrogating?” He asked.

“They got him down in the holding cells. Kinda useless now, hasn't responded since the incident,” Tony answered crossing his arms over his chest.

“Take me to him.”

_____

Steve followed along, Bucky refusing to leave your side. The man had indeed been unresponsive since the moment he woke, he would just stare and drool.

Strange checked his eyes and Steve looked around knowing the drill. “So, this man is just a regular human. How did he manage to tear your girl from her body?” He frowned settling on his haunches for a moment. He clapped his hands and looked up at Tony. “Gonna need to stand back.”

Tony backed up as Strange moved his hands, he rolled his eyes till lines appeared in thin air. “Well, we can add that to the list of weird things we’ve seen so far.”

Stephen didn’t hear him as he disappeared from the room. He knew the men couldn't see him anymore but he was in the astral realm, there Isaac looked up at him confused.

“Who are you?”

“My name is Dr. Stephen Strange, you are not where you should be. What did you do? Where is the woman?” he asked looking around, how had this man stranded himself outside of his own body?!

Isaac looked around for a moment and then smiled. “Ahhh, that woman?” He asked, “she’s gone. Poof, out of my head! Just like they said she would be!” He laughed, “but how are you here?”

Strange sighed, “they said?” He raised an eyebrow, “hold still,” he raised his hands in front of him, yellow light appearing around his wrists as he turned his hands in front of him. Isaac watched as what appeared to be a window simmered in thin air in front of him.

This man was playing his memories right before his own eyes! “Who are you?!” He cried backing away, “another mutant?!”

“No….just Supreme Sorcerer, your welcome by the way, saved this planet more times than I care to remember, which means I’ve saved your ungrateful-ahhh! Here it is…” He slowed and tutted as he came to the moment that you had touched this mans temples. “Ohhh, how did you get your hands on a shadow wolf?!”

______

You couldn’t see much. It was dark everywhere. Trying to remember what happened seemed futile, all you could recall was hearing a growl and then opening your eyes here.

Wherever here was.

Swallowing the bile that rose as you felt fear tear through you, you crouched behind what seemed to be a wall. You were confused and tired, it felt like you had been here for ages.

You shook your head to rid yourself of the feeling of deja-vu. Why did it feel as if you had been through this already?! Fighting the feeling of panic you backed away slowly before hearing a growl behind you.

You bolted, skidding and ducking you felt something huge just barely miss you as it crashed into the wall above you. You made yourself keep going, fear pushing you forwards. You had to keep going. You had to keep running if not…

A scream tore out of you as something clamped down on your leg, turning you saw a massive head, tendrils of smoke coming out of its teeth that had sunk down into your flesh, red eyes glaring at you. You were jerked side to side as your screams bounced off the walls on either side of you.

______

You couldn’t see much. It was dark everywhere. Trying to remember what happened seemed futile, all you could recall was hearing a growl and then opening your eyes here.

Wherever here was.

Swallowing the bile that rose as you felt fear tear through you, you crouched behind what seemed to be a wall. You were confused and tired, it felt like you had been here for ages.


	15. Chapter 15

 

Tony paced back and forth as Steve watched Strange take a large gulp of scotch. “So…this man had a Shadow Wolf in his head?! And t-this wolf did what?!”

“She’s been dragged into the Shadow Realm, how they harnessed a Shadow Wolf long enough to cage it inside this mans head only to be released when she entered his mind I have no idea. It took long enough to get this idiot back into his own head, all that kicking and screaming.” He rolled his eyes annoyed. “He was stupid enough to get knocked out when the Wolf was dragging her out, good thing the idiot had enough sense to stay by his body.” He sighed pinching the bridge of his nose. He needed sleep, it had drained him just dealing with the man.

Isaac had literally kicked and screamed about him being unholy. He had a Shadow Wolf in his head for gods sake and… Strange shook his head exasperated. He hated dealing with idiots.

Steve was staring at him. “How do we get her back?”

Strange rubbed his temples. “It’s not going to be easy. I’m going to have to enter the Shadow realm, locate her and bring her back. We don’t even know how long she’s been in there.”

Tony scoffed, “it’s been two days!”

Strange sat back, “time passes differently in other realms. It could be present time, a minute could be a year, or a few days, maybe an hour.”

Steve felt the air rush out of him. “She has no defensive training. She’s just a low level mind reader.”

Strange paled at this. “If I find her it will be a miracle.”

“When  _we_  find her.” Steve amended, he would take no less. He ignored Strange’s look of concern. “When do we move?”

Strange sighed. “Of course you’re coming, listen I need rest. Give me two hours.”

______

You couldn’t see much. It was dark everywhere. Trying to remember what happened seemed futile, all you could recall was hearing a growl and then opening your eyes here.

Wherever here was.

Swallowing the bile that rose as you felt fear tear through you, you crouched behind what seemed to be a wall. You were confused and tired, it felt like you had been here for ages.

You moved forwards quietly, a memory of laughter filtered through the air and you shook your head as Clint’s laughter and Nat’s voice murmured through your head.

How long had it been since you had them over? How long since you had felt Bucky’s lips against your own? You felt your throat tighten. You couldn’t think of that, you needed to concentrate.

You slipped under the wall, the hole there just large enough for you to squeeze into. It always surprised you that you could squeeze into such tight spaces. It surprised you that you didn't need food or water too.

Reaching out you felt the grooves on the wall in front of you. Four, five, six…months? If they had really cared they would have been here. They would have come for you. You jolted as snarling was accompanied by snapping of teeth.

It always came. No rest. It always caught you. Pulling your feet further in under you, struggling to keep your breathing even you closed your eyes tight.

You  _had_  to remember. It felt like you were forgetting them and, your lip trembled, at least you hadn’t forgotten them. Maybe they had given up on you and forgotten you by now, but you kept those few memories close to your heart. It had been the happiest you had ever been.

 _‘C'mon Y/N, Jambalaya!’_  Sam’s voice.

 _’-so then Tony tripped and…’_  Rhodey’s laughter as Tony reached over to smack him.

Steve’s warm hugs.

Bucky’s quiet stare. The way he held you. The way he ran his fingers through your hair.  _‘Y/N’_. You let out a shaky breath. You could hear him and it gave you strength you needed.  _‘Y/N!’_  you frowned, you were officially loosing it. You felt a scream bubble up as the wolf outside paused before coming back with renewed vigor, its huge paws working its way into your safe hidey hole.

You let that scream loose as it’s large paw swiped your thigh. Terror at barely remembered memories of it mauling you before you came back to start over again. “NOOOO!” You screamed pulling back into the corner, if it got in…there was nowhere to go.

It would start all over again. You reached up and scraped into the wall, month seven.

______

Bucky didnt like what they were proposing. You had been torn away and thrown into another dimension? And you could be there alone? With a damned wolf hunting you down?

He paced the floor outside your hospital room. It had been two days, you hadn’t moved, your vitals had not changed.

“I’m coming,” he stated as he came to a stop before Steve.

Steve nodded. “Of course you are, I am too. Tony is working right now, he’s gonna be monitoring us from here. Doesn’t trust Strange, I think its the magic thing.” He shook his head when Bucky threw him a look, “I know, I know. What more do we have though? And c'mon, we have Wanda and we’re not gonna believe in magic?”

“I am coming too,” both men looked over at her as she stepped into the corridor, Wyatt right behind her. “He has been asking non-stop for her. He deserves to be beside her.” She lifted her chin in defiance daring them to challenge her.

Bucky smiled softly. “Wyatt, you are welcome to visit her.” He paused before continuing, “please stay with her if I have to go?”

The shaggy haired brunette sported a shiner, but he nodded as he looked at Bucky, “she stopped them cause they wouldn’t let me by to come see her.“ He nodded at Wanda, "I guess I had technically lost the fight, I just cant give up on her though.” He gave Bucky a sheepish grin as he moved past them into your room.

Bucky stared after him for a minute, watching the chef grasp your hands in his. “We need to get her home. Now.”

_____

  
Strange had known he wouldn't be going alone, he knew they would insist on going with him. He was grateful it was just the two, when the woman stepped up he raised his eyebrow in surprise.

“I am coming too,” she informed him.

He let a smile slide into place, “of course you are,” he murmured. “This isn’t going to be pleasant,” he sighed. Shifting his hands, the amulet around his neck began to glow, the air crackled as a glowing black line split the air right in front of them.

Wanda let out a gasp as she felt the darkness seep through before it split open. She lifted her chin as she barely felt your mind whisper by her. “She is in terrible danger!” She gasped bringing her hands to her lips.

Strange frowned, looking at Wanda curiously. He wondered how he had missed sensing her powers. “Strong little witch,” he murmured to himself.

Bucky broke out into a run. Strange shouted after him, and growled when Steve followed. “Could at least let me secure the door dammit!” He yelled after them.

He glowered, but was behind them within seconds, Wanda following close behind him. “Alright little witch, take lead since you know her. It’ll be easier for you to locate her.”

Wanda nodded concentrating on the fear that seemed to seep off of you. She moved quickly as the three men fell in line behind her.

_____

You let a whimper escape you as you saw the snout make its way into your hidey hole. Not again. You struggled to breathe, trying desperately to remember his lips against yours, nothing. You frowned, who’s lips had you been trying to remember? His…but who was he?

You tried to remember the lilting laughter when Wanda tossed her head back. It didn’t come.

The tall blonde…what was his name again? He, he had blue eyes?

C-Clint…Bar-Baron? You shook your head as you realized that was wrong. Teeth caught your ankle making you scream. It happened every day. Your fingers tried to dig into the concrete flooring as it began to drag you out.

This was nothing new.

You would come back again right?

The growling vibrated through you as it clenched down and dragged you out. Its large paws slamming down on your chest as you turned onto your back to face it, air leaving you in a choked scream.

Its jaws snapped in your face and you knew what was coming. You screwed your eyes shut, trying desperately to remember….remember what? You knew the teeth were coming…

It didn't.

You opened your eyes, the wolf was frozen in place, red glowing light encompassing its body. You let out a choked sob confused. Was this a new trick? It would attack you now right?

“Y/N!” You looked up at the man that came running towards you. He pulled you out from under the wolf gently. “My god Y/N! Baby are you okay?”

You sobbed as you clung to this man. You didn't know who he was, but damned it was good to see another person.

“Move now!” Strange demanded, as the wolf struggled in the air. Wanda had caught it with her powers and he had been relatively impressed at how strong she was. But the longer they stayed the worse it would be. He had been surprised to find only one wolf. They ran in packs generally.

Wanda frowned, “I agree, I do not know how much longer I can hold him.”

Strange nodded, “let me help,” the wall moved as Wanda watched him work. She stared in awe as he deconstructed it and she released the wolf into the newly formed cage. “That’ll hold it for awhile. Hopefully till we get out of here. We need to head back, now,” he uttered placing a hand on the small of her back. He ground his teeth as the lone wolf howled, “that's not a good sign,” he muttered as they heard howls in response.

Wanda’s eyes widened as he pushed her to move, “that one was strong as it was!” She gasped hurrying as Cap fell in line behind her and Strange.

Bucky lifted you in his arms. He didn't like how you were responding, you didn't seem to know him. Still you clung to him and wouldn’t let go.

“We’re getting you out of here okay?” He murmured in your hair.

You knew you were digging your nails into him, but you were afraid that if you let go he would disappear. And you didn't need that. You took in his scent, he was real. He was real and he lifted you like nothing, cradling you close and calling you doll.

You had lost your mind, but this was a good way to go you mused. This man was handsome and strong and smelled good. It could have been that you lost your mind to the wolf…

This was quite a way to go.


	16. Chapter 16

 

Bucky struggled to remember which way was which. There was no real sense of direction in this place. He heard a growl to his right and ducked, pulling you closer into his chest as he wrapped himself around you, ready to take the brunt of the hit. He looked up as he heard a yelp and Steve shook his head at him, using his shield he had knocked the large shadow wolf into the air, sending it several feet back.

“Let’s go!” He jerked his head and Bucky didn't need to be told twice. He followed Steve’s lead as Wanda came running up behind him, Strange lagged behind.

Wanda took lead as neither Bucky nor Steve knew were they were headed and she waved a wolf out of their way,her red magic wrapping around its body and flinging it air born. She saw one too late, Steve fending off another she was sure it would hit her.

Wanda grimaced and was shocked when a portal opened mere inches from her, the wolf disappearing into it. Looking around she saw Strange smile in her direction. She smirked back.

Bucky looked down at you, you weren’t moving and little groans escaped you. He wondered how long you had been here? What did you have to go through?

“There!” Wanda exclaimed, reaching out with both hands she erected two walls of red magic to clear a path to the opening they had come through. Yellow mixed in with her magic and she smiled, he was boosting her magic, she could feel the difference in it throughout her body.

This Strange man was….interesting.

Bucky surged forwards as the barking and growling intensified. Something slammed into the red and yellow walls on either side of him and he unconsciously cringed.

Wanda gave out a small yelp as Steve swept her up in his arms, falling in step behind Bucky now that the oath was clear. Wanda looked over his broad shoulder and saw Strange flying close behind them, his back to her, he was fending off the wolves that were snapping on his heels.

Tony jumped as Bucky came through first, Steve close behind, Wanda already moving her hands to help close the portal to the shadow realm as Stephen flew through, landing on his back, his own hands flying in patterns.

Stephen let his head fall onto the ground as he looked up at the others. “Well, that was all a bit of fun. Maybe tea? And some sleep while we’re at it?” He chuckled, Wanda’s giggle catching his attention.

Bucky straightened, you no longer in his arms, he looked around confused, “what happened?! I HAD HER!” He exclaimed turning around in his spot. He caught Strange by the front of his shirt, bending over him. “Open it back up! I need to get her!”

Strange looked up at him, “you held her astral form, her spirit, once you crossed over with her it went right back to where it should be-her body.”

Bucky caught his breath, letting go of Strange who fell back with a grunt, “Get Bruce to medical.” He demanded of Tony as he began stalking through the corridors. Tony was right behind him.

Steve carefully set Wanda onto her feet. She smiled up at him nodding as he gave her a quick glance, “go, I will be by after.” She watched Steve disappeared after the other three as Stephen stood. “That was new,” she offered without looking at him.

Stephen smiled, “what was? The Shadow Realm? You know cause I take my vacations there, too much sun in London you know and…” He look at her as she giggled again, words failing him.

“No, I meant…my powers. I have never been able to use them so freely. It was,” she looked at the ceiling for a moment, “invigorating.”

Strange quirked a quick smile at her, “you know you could improve, if you wanted I, uhhh, could teach you?”

Wanda’s large brown eyes fell on him, “that would be very much appreciated!” she answered tilting her head to one side smiling.

  
Stephen smiled broadly.

_______

Dr. Cho hurried alongside Bruce as Bucky stomped in rushing to your side. They quickly brushed him away, demanding what they needed from their assistants who in turn hurried around, one quickly pushing him to the corner of the room. Monitors came to life quickly adding to the cacophony in Bucky’s head.

Bucky watched as they attached more stickers to your forehead and temples, Bruce quickly administered another I.V. drip as your heart began to race, he was more frantic than Bucky had ever seen him. Neither were sure what happened and why your vitals had jumped dramatically, both scurrying to get you to calm down. Cho finally administered a sedative as Bruce added his own mixture to calm you down.

“Bucky? Buck….you alright?” Steve’s voice seemed to echo in his head. “BUCK?!”

Everything went black.

_______

Bucky woke sometime later, his head swam as he tried to sit up and strong hands pushed him back down onto his back. “Y/N?” He asked without opening his eyes.

“She’s still out, but physically she’s fine. We’re waiting for her to wake up,” Steve answered quietly, “in the bed next to you. You alright?” He asked when Bucky finally cracked an eye open.

“Y-yeah, I don't know what happened. I was staring at her, and they kept putting all this medical crap on her an-” Bucky’s voice cracked and he draped his arm across his face.

He felt Steve’s hand on his arm, “I know, pal. Your adrenaline musta crashed and so did you. After running from those things,” he made a face and shook his head, “Luckily we had Wanda and Strange there to clear everything for us. Stephen will be down in the morning if she hasn't woken up yet. He wants to look her over, I’m sure Wanda will be here too.”

Bucky nodded exhausted. “What do I do Steve? I can’t lose her, she’s everything to me.”

Steve frowned, Bucky still had his arm draped over his face but it didn't stifle the small noises as he tried to keep from crying. Steve didn't know what to do, he gripped his friends hand in his looking over at your still form.


	17. Chapter 17

 

You blinked as the light ran across your eyes. Dr. Cho smiled apologetically, “you seem to be alright,” she murmured holding up a few fingers.

You let out a small laugh and sobered when she raised an eyebrow. “Oh, seriously? Three, two, five…” you sighed catching her hand gingerly in yours, “I am fine. I feel fine. Can I go home now?” You asked exasperated.

She smiled, “your not going anywhere for the next 72 hours, Y/N! I am sorry! I know how annoying you find it to be in the medical ward but its for the best.” She chuckled lightly as you sat back groaning.

Cho took a seat next to you opening a file, “I have to ask you a few questions. Okay?” She looked at you till you nodded. “What do you last remember as clear as day?”

You bit your bottom lip. “Well, there was Tony’s party a couple months ago right?” You frowned as she wrote it down, something prickled at the back of your mind and you jumped as you heard a snarl behind you.

Cho jumped at your sudden movement. “Y/N?” She watched you warily as you stared at the floor beside your bed in fear. “Y/N? What is it?”

“Its been seven months Helen,” she looked up at you as your voice had lowered and it sent a chill throughout her, Cho was shaken as you turned to look at her. “Seven months, three months prior to that was the party,” you frowned and blinked a few times before looking back up at her. Opening your mouth again your voice was softer this time, non-threatening, “I was so alone there,” you dropped your face into your hands and shook your head.

Helen moved forwards and put her hands on your shoulders. “Y/N-”

You snapped your head up to her, “something is wrong with me Helen,” your eyes were wide as you looked at her. “I’m not safe!”

_______

Bucky shook his head, “theres no way we were gone that long!” He exclaimed. “We were only in there for a few seconds!”

Tony shook his head looking at the four in front of him. Wanda and Steve looked slightly confused but Stephen only sat there quietly. “No, we have everything recorded, the moment you three stepped through the portal to the moment you came out. It was almost roughly a month and a half.”

Bucky paced the floor, “that would mean she was there….”

“Almost seven months,” Stephen supplied. He nodded, “I did tell you time moved differently in other realms. Even if you were to go back the time would probably shift and move differently again.” He sighed and smiled as a woman entered and handed him a cup of tea, “look we don’t know what she went through while she was there. She needs to take it easy, Wanda and I have been working together and I believe she could help her through this. It would be slow tedious work, but I know she can handle it.”

Wanda blushed at his words and nodded, “I would very much like to help Y/N.”

Bucky turned in his steps, Tony calling out after him.

______

Helen looked flustered as he stepped into the medical ward and he moved quickly as he heard your screams. “What happened?” He demanded.

“I was on my way to get you! I don’t know. She just started screaming, we’ve given her the allotted amount of suppressants but they aren’t working!” She stopped at the door of your room as he moved in.

______

You shoved Helen away from you as the snarls became louder, “get out! Get out before they come for you too!”

Helen looked around scared, “who?! Before who gets me?! Y/N! Please? There is no one else here!”

“GET OUT!!” you screamed, they were coming for you. They would rip you apart again, just like every night. You brought your knees up to your chest wrapping yourself into a ball.

The barks and howls echoing in your mind as you screamed at her to escape.

You rocked back and forth trying to push the sounds out of your head, tears streaking down your face when the door slammed open.

You gasped in a breath as Bucky stood there. “No.” The single word that escaped your lips was broken and mangled. They would get him too.

You shook your head viciously as he walked towards you. You shoved at the wall of his chest as he pulled you into him. Shoving your arms around his neck with one hand and forcing your legs around his waist with the other.

You opened your mouth to protest when his lips came down on yours.

And everything went silent.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW, SMUT

You struggled against him as his lips closed on yours. The wolves were here! He had to get away! Bucky jerked you into him his body hard and strong against yours, lips claiming yours stifling your screams and protests.

And everything was silent.

The snapping of teeth stopped, the snarls stopped, the growls and howling in the darkness disappeared as Bucky kissed you.

You melted into him, arms wrapped around his neck, legs about his waist. Bruce skidded in behind Helen, “WHOA!” escaping him before he came to a stop. He looked at Helen who smiled. “This?”

“Its worked, she became quiet. Not struggling, her heart rate even went down, vitals are evening out…” Helen smiled, “now what happens when they stop?”

Bucky pulled away, resting his forehead against yours, “it’s okay, I am right here.” He murmured his hand massaging the back of your neck, the other drawing soothing circles on your waist. “Y/N, so sorry, I should have been here…”

You clutched the back of his shirt. Taking in deep breaths, “B-Bucky,” you stuttered Eyes fluttering up to look at him. He was real, he was here, you were safe.

“Hey, hey there doll….there ya are,” he smiled leaning back and bending to see your face as he brought both hands up to cup it. He smiled as you met his cloudy blue gaze, “I see you.”

It broke your resolve, you broke into tears as he pulled you into his arms. He tore the medical crap off you and glared at Bruce and Helen, “I’m taking her to my rooms.” He growled daring them to stop him.

“Bucky, god Bucky!” Your fingers traced his face, running down his strong jaw, down his neck to his shoulders. Fluttering up into his hair, he sighed as your fingers carded into it, he closed his eyes as the elevator doors shut. He started as he felt your lips on his chin, “Bucky-its you, really you!” You whispered.

He groaned as you brought his lips down to yours, hungrily kissing him. You shifted in his arms as he held onto you, moving to straddle him, till he turned around and pinned you to the wall.

Bucky held your hips in his hands grinding into you, his tongue sliding over your bottom lip, “God baby, you taste so good!” He moaned as you moved your hips into his.

“Bucky….need you, need you. Please?” You whined arching into him as he slid his hands up into your shirt. You paused for a second as his hands slid up your sides, he held you up pinned between the elevator wall and his hips. He wasnt struggling to keep you up and he was practically devouring you.

You gasped as you heard a growl and realized it was coming from Bucky as he attacked your neck. You sighed, closing your eyes, letting out a giggle as the doors opened and Bucky easily moved with you in his arms.

He set you down long enough to strip the both of you of your clothes. You looked up at him anxiously for a moment, your breath left you as you saw the look of adoration on his face.

“How the hell did I get so lucky?!” He asked voice low and causing ripples of pleasure to run through you. Shaking your head he smiled at you, his hand on your tummy pushing you softly into bed. You watched him as he slowly climbed between your legs, nudging them apart and he nipped your bottom lip playfully.

You caught his face in your hands, “Bucky? Are you sure?” He furrowed his brows at you, “are you sure you want me?” Doubt was creeping in, not only did you not think yourself worthy of him, but now you carried the terrors of the other place with you. Did he really need that?

Bucky paused, dropping a kiss to your belly before he smiled at you. He pulled your hands up to his temples, “look for yourself doll, I’ll wait.”

You closed your eyes, your stomach turning with the thought of what you would find. But once you pressed into his mind you felt it.

Damned if he wasnt completely in love with you. You felt everything he had felt these past few days. To him it had been just days, you bit back a sob, you had been so wrong. So wrong. He had been frantic to get you back.

Bucky stared at you, blue eyes waiting and watching as you finally opened your eyes to look at him. “Bucky-” it was no more than a whisper and Bucky smiled up at you.

“Doll, you can doubt it all you want, all you gotta do is look, I don’t need anyone else. I don’t look at other dames, much less talk to ‘em, all I will ever need is you and…” He paused looking away before moving up between your legs and holding himself up slightly above you. “Doll, I dont got a ring, and I know this isnt the way or the proper time to do it. I know your struggling and I just got you back,” you froze his words leading to what you didnt want to begin to wish for lest you be devastated. “Y/N, I love you, I have been in love with you almost since the moment I laid eyes on you. I wanna marry you doll, if you’d have me. And you aint gotta answer me right away bu-”

You dragged him down into a kiss, Bucky chuckled against yours as you wrapped your legs around his waist, “doll?” he asked expression prompting an answer.

“YES! YES! All the yes’ in the world!” You moaned as he pressed into you at that moment his large member stretching you slowly as he didnt want to rush it. “Guh-God! Oh! Bucky, m-more!” You gasped reaching around him to claw at his back.

Bucky smirked as your mouth dropped open and you sucked in little gasps as he took his time. “I wanna feel ya doll, gonna take my time with you,” he groaned as he slid in slower still, your hips moving up into his trying to get more of him into you. “Got the rest of our lives doll, fuuuhhhck,” he grunted as he was finally completely sheathed in you. Bucky dropped little kisses across your face as he held still inside of you. “Y/N, Y/N, GOD Y/N!” He breathed your name a chant, you stared up at him ad he pulled out and moved back into you. Your breath halting with how intimate he had made this.

There was nothing else, the world stopped existing outside of the two of you. You ran your fingers down his face gently, before reaching up to dig into his silky locks. “Bucky, I love you,” he caught your lips with his. His large hands on your legs, pulling you into every thrust as he sped up.

You groaned as he thrust in a scream escaping you as he reached between you, his thumb finding your clit and causin you to jolt. “Oh, god!” You gasped digging your nails down his shoulders into his muscled back. You tossed your head to the side desperate for something as your belly tightened, “B-Bu-BUCKY! OH GOD! ITSTOOMUCHIC-CANT!OHHH!” You threw your head back as your orgasm washed over you, crying out you pulled him down closer to bite down on his shoulder.

“Fuck baby!” Bucky groaned as your walls clamped down on him, he thrust into you once more before coming undone and coming deep inside of you.

You gasped, chest heaving as he tried to keep from dropping on you completely. “Bucky….its fine…” you gasped and he let his weight fall onto you. A giggle escaped you as you laid there under him, “okay…I know I said it was fine…”

Bucky let out a huff, “not moving,” he murmured against your collarbone. You shivered as he trailed soft kisses along your neck, he still laid between your legs and you felt him begin to soften. Bucky chuckled and pulled out making you shiver. He trailed his fingers along your legs humming in content. “I love how soft you are,” he said making his way up your neck till he found your lips.

“Ohh? Cause I was thinking I could maybe lose a few pounds…”

Bucky growled nipping at your neck, “don’t you dare!” He grabbed your legs and jerked them around his waist, “I swear you are perfect the way you are and I love every inch of you!” You giggled as his hands found their way up to your breasts and he smirked down at you.

“Fine, yeah whatever…” You glanced up at him worry crossing your features for a moment. He raised his eyebrow at you waiting, “cuddle with me?”

Bucky frowned, “oh, cuddle? What is that? Never heard of it before!”

“Cuddling is a prerequisite to the sex….no cuddling no se-” you broke out into laughter as he rolled over and behind you, immediately pulling you into his larger frame, face buried into your neck.

“OHHHH! I know what cuddling is!” You laughed which was replaced by a yawn, “I love you Y/N, dont ever forget that.”


	19. Chapter 19

 

You hid away in Bucky’s rooms for a week. It wasnt that difficult as he stayed with you, only venturing out for food and a couple meetings. Still a month later and you knew you needed to step out sometime, the team had been restless from what Bucky told you. They kept asking about you and sending you small gifts. Wyatt had come once or twice but you couldn’t handle a visit.

It was time to stop hiding.

You woke to an empty bed, smiling at the note he left telling you he had gone to a meeting. Wanda would be by today. She was helping you work through your experiences.

You showered and changed into a tank and loose sweats, you were pulling your hair up into a ponytail when there was a knock at the door.

You welcomed Wanda in, surprised to see Stephen right behind her. “Hello,” you knew of him and that without him you would have been stranded in the Shadow Realm. Yet you had not interacted much with him.

He smiled charmingly at you as he entered. “Ms.Y/N, I am sorry to come unannounced. I felt it would be a good time to accompany Wanda and see how you were progressing.”

_____

Bucky frowned as he looked at Steve, “so someone was trying to get rid of her?”

Steve kept his gaze. “Nick and Maria have been investigating, its not easy to trap a Shadow Wolf, much less have one in your head without it ripping your sanity to shreds. We had Strange and Wanda interrogate him and retrieved some helpful information.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow, “they interrogated him together?”

Steve cleared his throat, a small smirk on his lips, “if you look at the files you’ll see it was a personal attack. They knew she worked for SHIELD, knew she would be the one to go into his mind. They wanted to take her out,” Steve looked over at Tony and let him continue.

Tony turned to the screen that came up as Bucky shuffled through the file. “You see here, this organization traffics weapons and drugs. Because of the work SHIELD and with Y/N’s help their business has been suffering. They wanted to take her out to continue on as always.”

Bucky clenched his jaw, “when do we leave?”

______

  
You looked at both of them as they settled before you. Wanda in a seat, Strange simply sitting down in thin air. You looked at him with wide eyes and Wanda laughed.

“It takes getting used to! The others have as well,” she offered as you sat cross legged on the couch.

“Ahh, yeah well. I am used to you moving things with your mind so, this isnt too far off.” You smiled.

Stephen offered you a small one, “ready?” He asked. You nodded, “remember, we are going into your head. You just have to open up to us.”

You nodded, it was always different. They didnt need to touch you as you did. It felt like a pressure against your temple for a moment before you opened your eyes to a scene.

You recognized the darkness that was the Shadow Realm. You felt fear crawling through your skin until Wanda’s hand touched your upper arms.

The terror that had threatened to choke you ceased. You let out a breath, you were okay. Not alone, this was memory.

Wanda had sobbed at the memories of you being attacked and torn apart. How you had gone through it countless times during your seven months there. The loneliness you had felt. The doubt.

But you two had worked through it.

You had lesser nightmares, you only heard whispers of growls. You didnt spend all day and night in bed.

Wanda looked at Stephen who stepped forwards. He turned to you, “ready to put this behind you?” He asked lifting his arms. You nodded. “So think of the one memory that makes you smile, your most treasured memory.”

It was easy enough.

Bucky laying atop you, asking you to marry him. His face so close, chocolate locks falling on either side of his face as he spoke, his blue eyes staring down at you as he murmured his love for you.

He was sorry he didnt have a ring, but that didnt matter. You loved him.

  
You gasped as your eyes snapped open. Both Wanda and Stephen sitting before you and smiling. Wanda squealed tears brimming as she flung herself at you.

“Why did you not tell me?!” She giggled.

You wrapped your arms around her as you fell back on the couch. “I uhhhh, thought you knew! You’ve been in my head!”

She laughed pulling back, “I do not pry upon private moment between the two of you!” She practically vibrated from excitement.

The three of you looked over as the door opened and Bucky walked in. His smile faltered seeing the extra person but he walked over placing a liss to your temple. “Hey doll, you okay?”

“How dare you keep this hidden?!” Wanda accused standing, “we must celebrate!”

Bucky smirked shaking his head, “she finally saw that huh?” He ran a hand through his hair. “Look, I just wanna get her a ring first is all.”

Wanda narrowed her eyes at him. “Very well, soon Barnes!” She pointed at him as Stephen began pulling her towards the door.

Bucky laughed as you stood wrapping yourself around him. “Hey doll,” he pulled you around him and into his arms. “I have to tell you something.”


	20. Chapter 20

 

Steve moved forwards waving his hand once he saw it was clear. Bucky was right behind him. Nat and Clint above them in the rafters. The building was quiet, only a few enemies here and there.

Bucky felt like his skin was crawling itching to go all out on these fuckers. He wanted revenge for what they had out you through. For everything they had taken from you.

_____

_You stared at him as he finished getting ready, a small pout on your lips._

_“Babe, stop looking like that.”_

_You jerked back, “like what?!”_

_Bucky chuckled as he could read your insecurities with ease now. He moved to stand in front of you, tilting your head back to look up at him you made a noise as he captured your lips with his._

_You smiled as he touched you, it had become habit between you two touching, his thoughts of how beautiful you were to him and how much he loved you making you blush. Then his thoughts began to wander… >_

_He chuckled pulling away, “you get that?” You nodded looking away, “doll, I promise when I get back I am gonna lock you in the bedroom and show you just how much I want you!”_

________

Bucky took a steadying breath in as he moved behind Steve, these men were going to pay.

Steve shoved him back holding him still, he reached up eyes going to the ceiling where Clint and Nat were sure to be. “Everybody ready for this?” He asked quietly into his comm.

“Just say the word Spangles, we’re right behind you.” Tony quipped over the comm.

Bucky brought his automatic up against his shoulder nodding wordlessly at Steve as his friend looked at him. They were ready.

Steve took a deep breath, “on my mark,” he pulled his arm back and swung, his shield flying through the air and hitting several men as Nat repelled down, Clint right behind her.

Men began to scream as they fired off rounds, the stutter of machine guns heard as chaos erupted. Bucky ran into the fray.

______

Wyatt looked over at you as your hand shook. He grabbed it and smiled encouragingly. “They’ll be fine Y/N,” he winked at you, “so you gonna finally spill all the juicy details about your boyfriend?”

“Ahem, I am right here,” Stephen murmured before putting his cup to his lips and looking at you.

Wanda giggled as Wyatt rolled his eyes, “you can’t complain since this was lunch with us! You should know since I am me!” He smirked at Wanda, “you know hes not that bad looking maybe…”

You giggled as Wanda put her hand over Wyatt's mouth. “No! Stop right there!” She exclaimed turning bright red as she could easily read his mind.

You let out a laugh and Stephen joined you.

It wasnt much, you werent ready to go back into the kitchen but it was something. You still feared hearing a growl or snarl, but it didnt come and you relaxed.

_______

Steve followed as Bucky took lead, hurrying after several men that had run away. Tony and Rhodes had come in and helped subdue those that were there.

Bucky fired off as the last one ducked through a doorway. Throwing his spent weapon down he ran after them, he caught one around the waist, a grunt leaving them both as they fell to the floor.

Bucky let loose a barrage of hits on the man beneath him before he was tackled to the ground by several others. The men above him disappeared and Steve held out a hand.

“Dont go off too quick jerk, Y/N will kill me if I come back without you.”

“So Y/N answers to you now?” Both men looked up at the man that stood behind the others. “She is rather easy to handle when she believes she is loved, we were able to use her for so many years making her believe those people were her real family.”

Bucky felt as if the wind had been knocked out of him. “What did you say?!”

Steve held him back, “are you talking about her family?”

“They arent her family!” He chuckled, “how do you think we were able to find her again? Those people at SHIELD are not so smart!”

Steve and Bucky felt something fly over them and Tony bowled into the group of men. “How dare you play with her feelings like that?!” Bucky growled before tearing into the fray, Steve jumping in as well.

Bucky vaults over a couple men and catches one by the throat, shoving him into the ground. He tightens his grip on the man and smirks down at him.

“Feel that?” He asks tightening again, “cant breathe? World is getting smaller? You cant fight against it? Thats how Y/N has felt….but its alright now. Now she has me.”the man beneath him flails helplessly.

Steve pulls Bucky off of him, “not like this, he needs to face what he’s done.” Steve looks down at the unconscious man, “he needs to face Y/N, and she him. It wont be over till she does.”


	21. Chapter 21

 

Bucky squeezed your hand and you looked up at him. “Doll, you don't gotta do this. Wanda can easily do this, Strange would help her.”

You pursed your lips looking at the man that had caused you so much pain. He had used you and ruined you.  
  
‘You got me doll.’ You swallowed trying not to breaks into sobs yet again at his silent encouragement.

______

Two days ago…

When Bucky and Steve had come back they had sat you down and told you everything. Nat had brought you copies of everything she had found, not waiting for clearance from Fury and not caring.

With the four of them beside you, you had learned the truth. Your family had been killed once they had an agent pretend to love you. He had you move in with him, seperating you from your family and helping the rift between you and your family grow ever greater. Not allowing you to speak to them, erasing their calls and e-mails, turning them away when they came to visit. He had whispered in your ear that they didnt love you. They had turned their backs on you. He was the only one you could trust.

He would take you with him, telling you how difficult it was to deal with these men. If only there was a way to get the information he needed. You had been happy to help him, your love, your world. When you came home to find him with another woman he had you arrested. You were too critical to leave now.

With plenty of torture, mentally and physically they had managed to make you believe those people were your family.

Stephen and Wanda held you together as you tried to take everything in. Your heart breaking into pieces yet again. You had been so foolish, it had been your fault your family had been killed. It was all your fault! Bucky wrapped you in his arms whispering into you ear.

Wanda had caught your face in her slim hands. “This is real,” she bit out reading your mind. “We are not tricking you, we love you!” She glared at you as you questioned everything again.

It had broken you, sobs tearing out of your throat as you clutched at Bucky. His thoughts completely honest and true. You knew it, but Wanda opened herself to you bringing your hand to her own temple and then Steve.

The feeling of acceptance and love, the fact that they believed you to be family… You had been ashamed to have ever doubted them. You had burrowed your face into Bucky’s chest struggling to breathe. Struggling to hold onto reality.

Bucky held you as Stephen and Wanda telepathically helped you. It had taken a few hours, but you had made it through.

When your sobs had quietened Bucky looked at you finding you had fallen asleep.

Wanda smiled at him, “she will be fine now,” she pushed your hair from your face gently. “She needs rest, before she must face him. So do we,” she reached back as Stephen caught her hand, “I am still learning, but it is tiring. We can interrogate him when we awaken, do not permit her to face him alone, understood? We must be here for her!”

Bucky nodded standing with you in his arms. “Thank you Wanda, Stephen.” He felt completely drained, unable to help you much more than simply being by your side and holding your hand as you went through hell yet again.

“Hey Bucky?” He turned at Stephen’s call pausing before your bedroom door, “you’re doing more for her than you think you are,” he offered encouragingly as he wrapped his arm around Wanda’s waist. “It is exactly what she needs, a woman that has her partners love, faith, and trust is the strongest woman in the world.”

Wanda blushed as he pulled her into his side.

Bucky shook his head, how had he missed that? He knew they would let themselves out and so had taken you to bed, kicking the door shut behind him and laying you in bed. He quickly wrapped himself around you.

_____

You shook your head, “I’ve got to do this. I have to face him again. He’s taken everything from me Bucky. I can’t let him win, I can’t lose to him yet again.” You took a deep breath in, “plus…now I have you.”

Bucky pulled you into his arms, locking his lips over yours. You returned the kiss with as much love and passion as you could pour into it. You held onto him for a moment as he finally pulled away.

“Damn right you do!” He emphasized with a quick peck to your lips.

“Alright, alright that is enough,” Stephen murmured walking into the room with Wanda who smiled at you two. “Do you want us to go in with you?” He asked seriously. “We can monitor from here no problem. What is it that you are most comfortable with?”

You looked over your shoulder. “I will go in alone.”


	22. Chapter 22

 

“Eduardo Carbajal,” the man looked up at you a smile spreading over his face.

“Ahh, Y/N!” He leaned forwards in his seat and raised an eyebrow, “I would hug you…but as you can see,” he shrugged letting his sentence trail as you sat down before him, dropping a fat file down on the table before him.

You could feel the whisper of Wanda’s touch, it was meant to reassure you as she monitored. You smiled, “the years have not been kind to you Eduardo.”

He shrugged again looking at the mirror behind you. “What can I say? At least I am still in shape.”

You let out a small chuckle, “low blow, but that doesn't bother me anymore. Lets get to it shall we?” You cleared your throat flipping the pages in the file. “Mmm, you have been busy since I left you. Oh! Well, it seems I have hindered you several times since then actually. Oh, no wonder you came after me with a vengeance.” You set the file aside and placed your hands atop it looking him in the eye.

He rolled his eyes feigning boredom. “And?”

“There are things missing from this file Eduardo,” you smiled softly as he shifted. “You know why I am here, I used to do this for you once upon a time.” No response, you sighed and reached across. This time he jerked back, “what is it? Are you alright?” You asked looking at him with concern.

“You bitch!” He growled at you.

“Now Eduardo, there is no need for name calling, let us keep this professional.” You tsked at him, “you know thanks to your little stunt with the Shadow Realm and those damned wolves ripping me apart every day for months I have become stronger.” He looked at you, “yes Eduardo, I dont even have to touch you now.”

Eduardo grunted as he felt a pressure in the temples, he let out a small moan as you entered his mind, viciously. “Stop,” he groaned.

You tilted your head to the side, “no, when did you stop? When did you have mercy? No, you will receive none of these.” You plunged into his mind pulling the information you needed and then brought forth all the screams of those he had tortured to the forefront of his mind. Planting them there.

“You will hear their screams above your own for the rest of your pathetic life. Oh,” you smiled coldly at him, “you will never be able to take your own life either, so do not hope for that!”

You stood as the door opened and Hill came in, “Y/N! What did you do?!” She asked as the man jerked in his seat shaking his head. A small cry left his lips as he shook his head.

“I have given him what he was due,” you nodded as you walked past her. Stephen and Wanda staring at you. “You can undo it of you so wish, just let him suffer a little more,” you stared at Wanda who shook her head.

“It is what is right,” she whispered as Stephen squeezed her hand.

Bucky wrapped you up in his arms, “I have to give them the information, I know he will have to be sane for them to prosecute him, but-”

Bucky cut you off, his lips on yours. You whimpered as he ran his hands down your sides, hands falling on your ass. “Your perfect doll, dont doubt that. Lets get that info onto paper for them.” He smiled pecking the tip of your nose, “you did what you had to do, its done now.”

You closed your eyes as he pulled you into him, breathing in his scent to calm your shaky nerves. You wrapped your arms around his muscled torso and let your head rest on his chest.

It was done, your past was now behind you and you only had the future to look forwards to.

A future with Bucky.

With the Avengers as your family.

_______

Clint stuck his tongue out as he reached for more biscuits, Sam beating him to them and chuckling.

“Now! You two better leave some for the others!” You exclaimed from the kitchen. You were busy pulling the turkey out.

Thanksgiving 2.0 you all had missed it due to aliens invading the city again. But you had planned for that. Everybody had been surprised to receive an invite to Steve and Bucky’s floor. Which you now shared with them.

Wyatt had helped you with the cooking. Bucky had gone for the groceries. It was two months late but mid-January was relatively quiet for the superheros and they had all cheered.

Wanda and Stephen appeared out of a portal, making Sam and Clint jump. The latter running over to hug her and take her plate of goodies from her.

You smiled as you greeted them kissing both their cheeks. “Everybody else will be home soon!” You sighed happily. It had been six months since you had finally closed the lid on your past.

Months full of laughter and happiness.

Months full of Bucky.

You bit your lip, he should have been home with Steve by now. Nat walked in, a pretty blond holding her hand looking around nervously. She smiled as she recognized Clint quickly hugging him.

Nat introduced her to everyone, Sophie Mercano. Everyone welcome her to the loud family.

The door opened and Steve stepped in, Bucky right behind him. “We got the cake!” Clint rooted loudly and you smacked him as he started to make his way towards them.

Bucky chuckled watchin you in the middle of the chaos, your smile blinding him and filling his heart. He was nervous and you looked over at him concern on your face.

He smiled and winked thinking about last nights baseball game to deter you from reading his thoughts.

Steve had helped him pick out the ring, it was why they had taken extra longer. Wanda looked over at him knowingly and leaned in to whisper into Stephen’s ear. His smile was slow but wide as he winked at Bucky. He rolled his eyes as he moved through everyone and wrapped his arms around you.

You narrowed your eyes at Bucky, “James Buchanan Barnes, what are you up to?” You asked as he flooded you with thoughts of his love for you and what he wanted to do to every inch of you. Your face turned beet red and you flustered smacking his chest as he chuckled low in your ear, nibbling on it for a second.

The door swung open and Tony stepped in, “alright Robocop! We’re here!” He practically yelled as Rhodey and Maria followed him in, “what is so important you threatened to kill us via text if we weren’t here in time?”

Bucky laughed as all eyes turned to him and he held your hand in one the other in his pocket. “Y/N…”


End file.
